May 17, 2006

MARRIED ... WITH CHILDREN

THE COLONEL

By now everyone knows we've normalized relations with Libya, although normal isn't a word you associate with the Colonel. The Gaddafi clan runs the country like its own little petroleum theme park, yet all of them, from the Colonel on down, deny they have any role in running the country (the Colonel's title is Guide to the Revolution). They just happen to be filthy rich & own everything. Everyone knows the Colonel (whom some say is of Jewish descent*), but now that we're bffs, it's important to know the whole posse:

Muhammed: Eldest son by first wife who's 'out of favor'. Heads Libyan telecom monopoly, says by 2008 every single Libyan will have mobile (they might settle for breakfast). Also heads Libyan Olympic Committee. Gave Libya black eye in 2004 when Libya hosted World Chess Championship & reneged on agreement to allow Israelis: "We did not invite, & will not invite the Zionist enemy to this tournament." Hobbies: scuba diving.

Safiya. Second wife, mother of Saif al Islam, Saadi, Hannibal, Aisha, Saif al-Arab, Khamis (police officer), & Motassim (lives in exile in Egypt, possibly connected to 2002 coup attempt). Comes from influential tribe. Went postal after US Army killed Uday & Qusay Hussein, demanded Colonel save her sons from a similar fate. Saif denies his mother has any public role despite her numerous state visits, including a 1999 visit to Chad, which she thanked for helping Libya resist international sanctions.

Saif al Islam. b.1972. Name means sword of Islam. Heir apparent. Studied economics in London & Vienna where he enjoyed lavish lifestyle. Heads Gaddafi Intl. Assn. for Charitable Organizations, front  for Gaddafi family business. Denies any role in government (as well  as existence of any opposition), yet told Judith Miller getting rid of WMD program was his initiative. Also owns lucrative national fishing company. Called on Austrian Muslims to take to the streets over Danish cartoons.

Nicknames: the Principal, the Brave Young Man, Our Young Friend. Hobbies: Bengal tigers (has 2), falconry, blondes, painting: traveled the world with art exhibition The Desert is Not Silent, of which the Globe & Mail said "Since Nero, there has been a depressing connection between bad art & megalomaniac regimes." Friends: Jorge Haider. Currently shagging: Israeli actress Orly Weinerman.

Saadi: b. 1973. Shares father's delusions of grandeur. Dreamed of being greatest soccer player in Africa. Described as useless by coach. Bodyguardsd fire on fans chanting against him at 1996 match, killing several people. Bought his way into Italian football league, played 2 games in 3 years. Suspended for doping. Plays movie mogul as head of World Navigator Entertainment. Share of family's purloined wealth said to be $8 billion; made $300 million offer for Liverpool FC.

Nickname: the Hooligan. Also known as His Arrogance in Sardinia, where he crashed his 130-ft yacht into a wharf & was ejected from the Billionaire's club for being an ass. Hobbies: jetsetting. Has partied with Nicole Kidman, Diego Maradona, 50 Cent, Enrique Iglesias, & Anna Kournikova. Married to daughter of former Libyan intelligence chief. Imagines himself likely candidate for (cough) Libyan ambassador to US.

Hannibal: b. 1974 Occupation: dissolute wastrel. Attended business school in Denmark. Has been involved in drunken brawls in Cagen, Rome, & Paris, where he was stopped for driving the wrong way on the Champs Elysees, assaulted his pregnant girlfriend & smashed up 2 hotel rooms. Hobbies: Getting pissed, attacking police officers. Currently shagging: Model Aline Skaf

Aisha: b. 1976 Sometimes-blonde bombshell & lawyer, referred to as Doctor. Fond of IRA terrorists & fellow Sunni nutter Saddam Hussein. Called Saddam's trial a sham & served on defense team before she got canned. Jordanian reporter vanished after writing article about Aisha that upset the Colonel. Heads "charity" that oversees "social rehabilitation centers," which strongly resemble prisons.  Was married last month to Libyan army officer, reportedly her father's cousin. Nickname: Claudia Schiffer of North Africa.

See also Gaddafi Family Album; Ask Colonel Gaddafi; Michael Totten: In the Land of the Brother Leader; Circle of Fire

*this is the same bio as the wikipedia entry, which omits only that crucial detail

Posted by Jeff at 12:10 AM | Comments (15)

May 08, 2006

GADDAFI'S BITCH AT THE U.N.

In case you needed any more evidence the UN is terminal, check out this piece on Jean Ziegler, a long-term UN parasite whose only qualifications are rabid anti-Americanism & being in Colonel Gaddafi's pocket.

Posted by Jeff at 06:49 AM | Comments (1)

May 03, 2006

ZIGGY GADDAFI

Gaddafi the Opera is shaping up as an exercise in flaccid moral relativism, which isn't surprising since the English National Opera commissioned Asian Dub Foundation - whose last CD was about the evil Iraq War - to write it with playwright Shan Khan, a leftist of typically muddled moral clarity:

"Gaddafi is a nutter, we know that, but so was Reagan. So is Bush, so is Blair. Gaddafi is a nutter because he blows people up. Do you not think they blow people up?"

Got that? Both Hitler & Churchill were nutters because they blew people up. Here's ADF's Steve Chandra Savale:

"What really drew me to Gaddafi was the fact that western petrol addiction gives him more importance than he would have had otherwise. In a sense, the West created the demon."

This is a typical finesse by which leftists absolve Third Worlders (including Bin Laden) of moral responsibility, & erase their victims, just as previous leftists absolved Lenin, Stalin, Mao, & Ho & erased their millions of victims. It's a Eurocentric, Chomskyite worldview that revolves entirely around the evils of the West:

"This will be anything but mainstream. Gaddafi's like Ziggy Stardust in reverse ... And the story has everything - oil, terrorism, women bodyguards. Gaddafi draws on his own Bedouin heritage as well as Marx, Rousseau & the Koran [& Hitler & Ramses] to create an idealistic revolution."

Bonus: it's directed by Antonia Bird, who made The Hamburg Cell, an attempt to humanize the 9/11 hijackers "because of the demonization that's gone on, the absolute refusal to look at the motivations." Hint: it's not about jihad. Get your Gaddafi tickets now!

VIDEO: Asian Dub Foundation & Sinead O'Conner: 1000 Mirrors

Posted by Jeff at 12:04 AM | Comments (5)

May 02, 2006

YES THEY'RE NAKED, BUT ARE THEY CHRISTIAN?

englebert gaddafi

Colonel Gaddafi is sounding rather sane lately:

"We have 50 million Muslims in Europe. There are signs that Allah will grant Islam victory in Europe - without swords, without guns, without conquests. The 50 million Muslims of Europe will turn it into a Muslim continent within a few decades. Allah mobilizes Turkey, & adds it to the European Union. That's another 50 million Muslims. There will be 100 million Muslims in Europe. Albania, which is Muslim, has already entered the EU. Bosnia has already entered the EU. 50% of its citizens are Muslims. Europe is in a predicament, & so is America. They should agree to become Islamic in the course of time, or else declare war on the Muslims."

On the other hand, it could just be syphilis:

"If Jesus were alive when Muhammad was sent, he would have followed him. All people must be Muslims. But since the holy texts that they read in Scandinavia are forged & call for hatred, they believe Muhammad is not their prophet. They drew Muhammad surrounded by veiled women, because of the veil worn by Muslim women. We expect them to draw Jesus surrounded by naked women, because Christian women are naked.  In Scandinavia women are naked. The holy texts of the West call for hatred, there is no doubt about it."

H/t Jane

Posted by Jeff at 12:41 AM | Comments (11)

April 15, 2006

AISHA FUGGAFI

 

One of the great mysteries of existence has always been how swank moll Aisha Gaddafi escaped the butt-fugliness of her siblings. Granted, cosmetics, peroxide, & collagen can engage the terrorism of genetics, but still, they didn't call her the Claudia Schiffer of North Africa for nothing.

Which is why it's disappointing to see her show up at her father's Gaddafi Lloyd Weber shindig last night - complete with are-they-still-breathing singers & Libyan children dressed as angels & waving candles - looking matronly in a frumpy white suit, sensible shoes, a rare headscarf, & seriously in need of a dye job.

Granted, the anniversary - the destruction of her childhood dreams - was a somber one, but still yes to peace (in her words) doesn't have to mean no to shizzle. At least last night she didn't make any faux pas like singing the praises of IRA bombers or Saddam Hussein, although she didn't have time to mention her father's bombing of a West Berlin nightclub, the Lockerbie bombing (270 dead), or the UTA airliner bombing (170 dead).

See also Absolutely Aisha (With a bow to Heather & Jessica)

Posted by Jeff at 10:49 AM | Comments (9)

April 14, 2006

THAT EXPLAINS A LOT ABOUT NICOLE

"I didn't hesitate for one moment. This is about making a difference in the world. When religion & politics have not been able to agree, music has always been able to resolve it."

Former music star Lionel Richie explaining why he's performing at Gaddafi's concert for the 20-year anniversary of Reagan's Tripoli raid. The purpose of the concert is so that people can 'express their regret for what their governments did,' & includes a film The Resistance to the Attack, & a demand for compensation.

Talking of compensation, Enrique Iglesias was said to have pocketed a six-figure check performing for Gaddafi's hideous spawn at a Caribbean New Year's bash. No word on how much Richie is being paid to make a difference...

See also Fug, Is it Me You're Looking For?

Posted by Jeff at 12:12 PM | Comments (4)

April 13, 2006

VEGAS GADDAFI

This shit really pisses me off: how do you satirize Gaddafi when he throws a grand gala hootenanny to commemorate the 20-year anniversary of Reagan's bombing of Tripoli, starring Lionel Richie?? "Artists from the United States & Europe will take part to send the whole world a message that art is capable of uniting peoples whom politics has divided & to express their regret for what their governments did."

"Candles will be lit & patriotic songs sung before the concert. A film on the US raid entitled The Resistance to the Attack is also to be shown, along with children's drawings & paintings. A conference is to be held, which organizers hope will be attended by Western academics, on the theme: The US attack, its consequences & the right of Libyans to compensation & an apology".

The shindig, organized by - cough - Osama Mohammad (remind me to address the severe shortage of male names in the Muslim world) - is called the Hana Festival for Freedom & Peace "in remembrance of the Libyan leader's slain daughter". Okay, it wasn't his daughter, it was some kid he adopted after the raid & called his daughter. And the raid was in retaliation for Gaddafi's bombing of a Berlin disco full of US servicemen.

But Lionel Richie? Haven't the Libyan people suffered enough?

See also How to Build a Lionel Richie Head; How Libya Carried Out the LaBelle Disco Bombing

UPDATE: From our new friend, Libya — senior Libyan thug official says Bush is "insane" & that the US "is a damned country, banished from divine mercy & deserving only of being cursed." Cursed?! Wait'll you hear Lionel Richie, buddy!

Posted by Jeff at 07:21 AM | Comments (6)

April 12, 2006

VACATIONS IN MORDOR

Colonel Gaddafi invited Christians & Jews to visit scenic Mecca in Saudi Arabia, an apartheid state run by a religious Gestapo. "Gaddafi challenged Muslim religious leaders to allow George Bush to enter the main mosque in Mecca & pray there" — hopefully not during the annual human stampede.

This went over well with the Muslim Brotherhood, who said "We are used to Gaddafi's crazes as he makes edicts as he pleases," pointing out the idea was against Islamic law, & suggesting Gaddafi only said it to provoke the Saudis, with whom he has "tense relations," probably because he tried to assassinate Crown Prince Abdullah.

Gaddafi said world conflict is caused by Christians & Jews who haven't figured out that they're really Muslims: "Those who slandered the Prophet in Scandinavia were wrong because they did not consider Mohammed as their prophet due to wrong teachings that incite hatred." He added that Muslims wouldn't dream of defaming another religion: "They respect Jesus, Mary & all others."

Gaddafi also called for "reviewing" the Bible, which is "false & phony." Speaking in Timbuktu, he promised to build a canal for the region, perhaps like his Great Man-Made River fiasco, which ended up as cost-effective as using bottles of Perrier for irrigation.

Posted by Jeff at 06:45 AM | Comments (4)

April 10, 2006

LA FEMME GADDAFI

No, she's not auditioning for Charlie's Angels³, she's one of Gaddafi's Amazon bodyguards:

"Gaddafi surrounds himself with handpicked female bodyguards. All of them swear an oath that they will give their lives for him. They never leave his side, night or day, & he insists they remain virgins. There is no shortage of volunteers for what is seen as a prestigious job. A special training college puts recruits through a tough program. Girls who don't drop out emerge as trained killers, experts with firearms & martial arts. Gaddafi makes the final selection &, despite the virginal tag, rumors abound that he demands their sexual favors."

On the other hand, a recently declassified cable from just after 9/11 shows Gaddafi shitting his pants in terror of America's wrath:

"The September 20, 2001, cable describes Mr. Gaddafi as calling 'every Arab leader in his Rolodex,' to intercede on his behalf with Washington. The cable says Arab diplomats relayed that the Libyan dictator famous for publicly confronting President Reagan with his 'line of death' speech, was 'hysterical in his telephone phone call to King Abdullah as if only his personal intervention would prevent U.S. action."

See also Stop Gaddafi, Libyan opposition website with interesting historical background

Posted by Jeff at 06:45 AM | Comments (10)

April 07, 2006

GADDAFI TOWER

Libya will fork out $250 million to build Gaddafi Tower, a 50 story five-star hotel / ego shrine in Dakar, Senegal:

"Major cities in the world are known to associate their names to an icon: New York has its Statute of Liberty, Paris has its Eiffel Tower, Kuala Lumpur, its Netronas towers, Sydney, its Opera. Gaddafi Tower will symbolize for generations to come the image of an emerging country in a thriving continent."  

Which is sweet, because Libya recently insinuated that the US should foot the $100 million it would cost to destroy its chemical weapons in order to comply with the 1997 Chemical Weapons Convention.

Speaking in Dakar, Gaddafi said Africans should learn African rather than European languages , which is also sweet because Libya has long suppressed Amazigh, a language of the original Berber peoples of North Africa conquered by the Arab invasion, & Libyan children are only allowed Arab names by law. (Maybe the Arabs should pay the Berbers compensation for colonialism.)

Posted by Jeff at 06:40 AM | Comments (4)

April 06, 2006

FASHION: THE GADDAFI LABEL

 

One of the things that distinguishes the Colonel from your typical déclassé psychopath eccentric is his sartorial shizzle. Over the years, he's carefully crafted his own signature look, a sort of Dune / Tank Girl / Jean Paul Gaultier chic. However, Muammer is also an intensely private tyrant who needs his space, & like Michael Jackson, knows how to pass undetected among the teeming proles, whether trolling for snatch in Ibiza or skulking for clandestine nukes in Buttf*ckistan. GQ Gaddafi, we salute you!

Posted by Jeff at 07:53 AM | Comments (5)

March 24, 2006

ALL WE ARE SAYING IS GIVE IT A REST

A 9-member "peace mission" marched hand in hand to the Egypt-Libyan border, singing Give Peace a Chance, Imagine & humming Wagner's Flight of the Valkyries (???), apparently in an attempt to torture the Libyan border patrol into letting them in, despite their lack of visas.

When the Libyans told them to scram, the peace mission became a pissing match, with the Iraqis, Afghans, Palestinians, & Iranians screaming at the Americans & Israelis for convincing them to slog across the godforsaken Sahara for such a stupid lame-ass idea.

The group, Breaking the Ice, planned to march from Jerusalem to Tripoli & plant an olive tree, even though Libya is a totalitarian shithole you wouldn't want to enter even with a visa. Like knocking on the gates of Mordor with Holly Near singing Dominique. The group previously sent a team of Israelis & Palestinians to the Antarctic wasteland, another brave if demented ordeal that didn't result in world peace either.

Next: send Margaret Cho to Fallujah!

Posted by Jeff at 08:40 PM | Comments (5)

March 05, 2006

WHAT WOULD WE DO WITHOUT FRANCE?

Posted by Jeff at 04:41 PM | Comments (4)

March 03, 2006

I'M GLAD HE'S NOT SPONSORING TERRORISM ANYMORE

"Libyans hate you - not the Danes - & I cannot rule out other attacks if damage$ for the colonial period are not forthcoming."

Colonel Gaddafi tries to shake down the Italians, pretending the riots in Benghazi were anti-Italian riots, when they were actually anti-Gaddafi riots.  Pussywhipped Italian liberal Piero Fassino: "I would hope that they are incidental opinions & that the Libyan authorities areto discuss in a peaceful & serene way all problems of reciprocal interest with Italy."

Hot babe Alessandra Mussolini was more direct: "If it hadn't been for my grandfather they would still be riding camels with turbans on their heads. They are the ones who should be paying us compensation."

Shakedown central: Gaddafi tries to shake down Amnesty International; Gaddafi tries to shake down Bulgaria; Libyans try to shake down the US for 1986 raid; Gaddafi tells Algerians to shake down the French

Posted by Jeff at 06:50 AM | Comments (2)

February 28, 2006

DR. AISHA'S HOME FOR WAYWARD GIRLS

Swank moll 'Doctor' Aisha Gaddafi, fresh from getting canned from Saddam Hussein's defense team, told Human Rights Watch she'd get right on the problem of Libya's social rehabilitation facilities, which bear an uncanny resemblance to prisons.

Ostensibly set up for 'protection' of  woman 'vulnerable to engaging in moral misconduct,' HRW notes most of the women are undergoing rehabilitation against their will, some simply because they were raped & have stained the family honor. Libya's advanced system of social rehabilitation offers these progressive techniques:

Women & girls sleep in locked quarters & are not allowed to leave. Subject to long periods of solitary confinement, occasionally in handcuffs, for reasons like 'talking back.' Most forced to endure virginity examinations. Some are as young as 16, but authorities provide no education except religious instruction. Have no opportunity to contest their confinement & no legal representation

Happily, there's an exit strategy: "There is no way out unless a male relative takes custody of the woman or girl or she consents to marriage, often to a stranger who comes to the facility looking for a wife." The women are attractive as brides because "there are no [pre-marriage] expenses. It is not the same as [marrying] a woman with a family."

A Libyan official denied the report, saying it was based on "certain psychologically vulnerable women & a misunderstanding of Libyan laws."

Irony Alert: Gaddafi Youth Summit. See also Absolutely Aisha!; Tick, Tick, Tick...

Posted by Jeff at 12:11 AM | Comments (9)

February 25, 2006

TICK, TICK, TICK...

Anonymous young Libyan in the wake of the Benghazi uprising & the murder of 11 anti-government protesters by Gaddafi's storm troopers:

"We, the youth of Benghazi, this is our chance to revolutionize against this pharaoh. This is the chance we have been waiting for since long ago ages. It came to us & we will not calm down until we bring down the pharaoh of this age."

Amnesty International has more:

• protests against the cartoons morphed into domestic unrest, including complaints by state employees that they had not been paid for 3 months.


• unrest had spread to Al Bayda, Darnah, & Tobruk


• protesters had broken into a state bank in Tobruk while in Benghazi they toppled placards of Gaddafi before state security fired on unarmed demonstrators, killing 11 & injuring 60


• Italy's consul reported that street clashes in Benghazi were still continuing on Saturday

Next to North Korea, Libya is probably the worst totalitarian hellhole on the planet. Gaddafi is a pharaoh, down to the graven idols, the cult of personality, the dynastic ambitions, & the preposterous monumentalism.  Michael Totten recounts his surreal visit to Planet Gaddafi in his killer piece In the Land of the Brother Leader, where he finally coaxes a taxi driver to speak his mind about the Colonel:

"We hate that fucking bastard, we have nothing to do with him. We keep our heads down & our mouths shut. We do our jobs, we go home. If I talk, they will take me out of my house in the night & put me in prison. He steals from us. The oil money goes to his friends.

"Tunisians next door are richer & they don’t even have any oil. We get 3 or 4 hundred dinars each month to live on. Our families are huge, we have five or six children. We don’t make enough to take care of them. I want to live in Lebanon. Beirut is the second Paris. It is civilized! Women & men mix freely in Lebanon."

In other news, Tony Blair commended Gaddafi for his peace efforts. See also Real Story Behind the Libyan Cartoon Massacre

Posted by Jeff at 11:10 AM | Comments (5)

February 21, 2006

THE REAL STORY BEHIND THE LIBYAN CARTOON MASSACRE

Not anger at the Danes, but at — Gaddafi!

"Benghazi is still out of control. The situation can precipitate any minute. Islamic radicalism has joined forces with domestic opposition."

anti-cartoon anti-government violence in liyba

It won't help you to blame Italy, Colonel. Maybe those worthless kids of yours should start packing for a long Swiss vacation. Meanwhile, in a brave display of dhimmitude, the Italian Foreign Minister promptly visited a mosque, blaming the Libyan riots on now-ex reforms Minister Roberto Calderoli's cartoon T-shirt.

Be careful what you wish for: just prior to the riots, semi-normal son Seif Gaddafi urged Austrian Muslims to take to the streets over the "clash of civilizations." He also showed his keen grasp of democracy by endorsing Bush's call for liberalization in the Mideast, then urged the EU to outlaw mocking the prophet or portraying Islam as a terrorist religion.

The Libyan protests took place in Benghazi, where tensions are already high after a lack of hospital hygiene caused hundreds of children to be infected with AIDS. The Colonel promptly blamed the Mossad, claimed the virus had been bioengineered in a Swiss lab, & sentenced 5 Bulgarian nurses & a Palestinian doctor to death, even though they arrived a year after the children were infected.

In other news, the long-awaitedng of "Gaddafi: the Opera" has been pushed out again. Check back in September.

Posted by Jeff at 08:22 PM | Comments (1)

February 07, 2006

THAT SHOULD TAKE CARE OF IT

Posted by Jeff at 04:46 PM | Comments (5)

January 27, 2006

FAIR & BALANCED & HAZARDOUS TO YOUR HEALTH

Before you get excited about this, you might want to read this. As Gaddafi Jr. says, "It is the right of a journalist to write what he wants but it also the state's right to question journalists."

Also, these people might want to check with these people about working conditions in the People's Paradise. Advice: pack for an extended tour...

Posted by Jeff at 12:38 PM | Comments (0)

January 18, 2006

STUPID WOMEN, STUPID CHOICES

Orly Weinerman, an Israeli TV actress, has been meeting Colonel Gaddafi spawn Seif Gaddafi in Italian love trysts so torrid she's said to be thinking of marriage & converting to Islam. A Libya / Israel wedding would be complicated by the fact Libya does not recognize Israel, & the Colonel has been known to say things like Israel is nothing but a mirage, something that does not exist (something Seif says about the Libyan opposition).

It's possible Orly was charmed by Seif's artistic sensitivities, as he's been touring the world with his exhibition The Desert is Not Silent, of which the Globe & Mail noted "ever since Nero, there has been a depressing connection between bad art & megalomaniac regimes." Or perhaps Orly was spellbound by Seif's oratory: "I'm not saying we are a democratic state 100%. But we have made Libya a model for the Middle East."

(Libya ranked last in the Economist index of political freedoms in the Mideast.)

Seif was previously known for entertaining a series of blondes in his Vienna bachelor digs, also home to his 2 Bengal tigers. His brother, delusional soccer wannabe Saadi Gaddafi, unsuccessfully romanced Nicole Kidman, & along with lady-killer Uday Hannibal Gaddafi, was the toast of the Venice Film Festival, where the two gangsters charmed Enrique Iglesias squeeze Anna Kournikova.

See also 10 Stupid Things Women Do to Mess Up Their Lives; Not Without My Daughter; 7 Habits of Highly Annoying Women

Posted by Jeff at 04:07 PM | Comments (17)

January 11, 2006

THE RISE & FALL OF A SOCCER LEGEND — NOT

Saadi Gaddafi, the world's most famous non-playing soccer star, is leaving the game. Apparently, he's been offered a 'prestigious government position' in Libya he can't say no to. (Saadi earlier speculated that he might be appointed - cough - Libyan ambassador to the US.)  For the benefit of those who've been breathlessly following this drama, here is a timeline of Saadi's career:

1969 Colonel Gaddafi takes power in coup. Spectator sports banned: "Sport is a public activity that must be practiced rather than watched."

1983 10yo Saadi begins playing soccer, senses destiny

1996 During  football match between Al-Ettihad & Al-Ahli club, Saadi allegedly orders personal security guards to fire on fans who are shouting slogans against him, killing 20. Sacks Libyan soccer coach who says "He is not a useful player. He is missing 2 fundamental things: speed & endurance." Opposing players said to run backwards to avoid him.

1999 Appointed head of Libyan Football Federation. Tells BBC journalist he dreams of being Africa's number one soccer player

2002 At FIFA congress, bribes 20 clubs to reelect corrupt president Sepp Blatter

July 2003 30yo Saadi, who's never played professionally, signed by Perugia as publicity stunt by florid coach Luciano Gaucci. Later admits receiving no salary (by now worth $8 billion looted from national treasury). Hires decrepit has-been / dictator's friend Diego Maradona & disgraced sprinter Ben Johnson as coaches. Perugia's Aussie goalie advises Saadi to go home

Nov 2003 Suspended for 3 months for failing doping test. Italian commentator: "If you don't play, why dope? This is like a Hitchcock film."

May 2004 Makes first & only professional appearance as substitute against Juventus. Leads absurd bid for Libya to host 2010 World Cup.

March 2005 Visits Australia as head of Libyan Football Federation, but too busy wining & dining Nicole Kidman to play matches. Back home, doesn't make cut for World Cup qualifier. Angrily resigns as LFF president.

June 2005 Signs with Udinese. Never plays.

Jan 2006 Announces retirement. Soccer world mourns

Posted by Jeff at 05:53 AM | Comments (4)

January 05, 2006

I'M SORRY MR. GADDAFI, YOU'LL HAVE TO LEAVE YOUR WMDS IN THE VIP LOUNGE

heartbreakers / statesmen / bon vivants Hannibal & Saadi Gaddafi demonstrate secret libyan handshake

Party monsters Saadi & Motassim 'Hannibal' Gaddafi, the Colonel's worthless spawn, rocked the Caribbean New Year on St. Barts with an exclusive VIP performance by the legendary Enrique Iglesias.  The Gaddafi posse descended "with an entourage of 30 or 40 people, with lots of security. Every day they were on the beach, riding Jet Skis, & having long lunches with plenty of wine."

NY Daily News speculates the idea may have been planted at last year's Venice Film Festival, where Saadi & Uday Hannibal were the toast of the town, & where Enrique's squeeze Anna Kournikova made chums with the two gangsters. At Venice, the Gaddafis enjoyed a special performance by hip hop felon / prophet-for-our-time 50 Cent, who says rapping for the Tripoli home boyz was the highlight of his 2005, perhaps because he's so used to jonesing with criminals.

At least Enrique was too saavy to mingle with the Maghreb riff-raff, refusing to leave the VIP area, altho he was reportedly paid a six-figure fee to perform for the Libyan mafia. No word if Saadi & Hannibal found time to indulge their regular pastimes, such as beating up pregnant women, assaulting police officers, smashing up yachts, romancing Nicole Kidman, & pretending to play soccer.

Meanwhile, the Colonel announced his latest humanitarian epiphany, "aimed at assisting disadvantaged & vulnerable people" in Africa. He might want to start with the 130 Libyan political prisoners who began a hunger strike this week, to protest their continued imprisonment after Seif Gaddafi (the other reprobate) announced with great fanfare last fall that they would be released by last September.

Posted by Jeff at 05:43 AM | Comments (7)

December 27, 2005

CAUGHT IN HIS OWN TRAP

Libya's sham Supreme Court has overturned the bogus death sentences of 5 Bulgarian nurses & a Palestinian doctor, granting them a new fake trial. In Libya, this is called progress. It also raises the possibility that Austria's Schwarzenegger stadium will be renamed Gaddafi Stadium to honor the spirit of clemency.

By coincidence, the reversal comes just after European & US officials agreed to set up a ransom fund for the families of AIDS-stricken children in Libya.  The saga began in 1999 as a blame game for Libya's appalling hospital hygiene, & a clever way for Gaddafi to channel popular anger at a powerless scapegoat.

The accused were originally charged with bioterrorism, with Gaddafi claiming the virus had been bioengineered to experiment on Libyan children. When this proved too loopy even for Gaddafi, they were charged with deliberately infecting children on orders of the Mossad.

They were convicted & sentenced to death by firing squad, even though they said their confessions had been obtained by torture & rape, & HIV discoverer Luc Montainger testified the infections started a year prior to the defendants' arrival. Gaddafi then toyed with his captives, trying to extort billions from Bulgaria, which wouldn't play.

But with the Iraq War & Gaddafi's Madonna-like reinvention as America's BFF, he got caught in his own trap. With Bush & the EU coming down hard on him, Gaddafi now has to alienate either the West (& Western investment) or the Libyan people, who he's whipped into hysteria.

Posted by Jeff at 09:04 AM | Comments (7)

December 13, 2005

EXCEPT FOR THE FACT THAT IT'S A ONE-PARTY TOTALITARIAN SHITHOLE RUN BY BEA ARTHUR IN DRAG

"The direct popular democracy exercised in the Libyan Jamahiriya represents an evolution of the conception of democracy & mankind should emulate it." — Former Democratic Senator Mike Gravel in Tripoli

In case you're thinking he's just a crank, Gravel was the person who read the Pentagon Papers into the Congressional Record, seconded his own nomination for Vice President at the 1972 Democratic Convention, & authored a book called Citizen Power, in which he advocated a guaranteed annual wage of $5000 whether one worked or not.

In 2003, he spoke at a conference for the anti-Semitic Barnes Review, which includes articles like Hitler: Overlooked Candidate for the Nobel Peace Prize; Holocaust Smoke  & Mirrors; Joseph Mengele: A New Look; Masonry & the Secret Empire; & Resisting the Smotherout ("Worse than any German war crimes, real or alleged, were the actual crimes of the Allies.")

Posted by Jeff at 12:29 PM | Comments (3)

November 25, 2005

YOU LIKED ME! YOU REALLY REALLY LIKED ME!

2005's eagerly awaited winner of the International Gaddafi Prize for Human Rights (sic) is ex-Malaysian PM Mahathir Mohammed, for his "deeds & contributions to the Islamic world." Presumably this includes his 2003 address stating that Jews rule the world & calling for Muslims to defeat them.

When his speech was condemned by Western leaders (notably excluding France), Mahathir said "the reaction of the world shows they control the world." In Muslim circles, Mahathir counts as a moderate. (By contrast, important intellectual Paul Krugman blamed Mahathir's comments on - George Bush.)

Mahathir, who went on to endorse John Kerry for US President, will accept his award in Libya, which by coincidence just ranked last - behind even Saudi Arabia - in the Economist's Index of Political Freedoms in the Middle East. Previous luminaries who've copped a Gaddafi include Louis Farrakhan, Fidel Castro, & Hugo Chavez.

Colonel Gaddafi in the news this week:

¶ Met with the lovely & grief-stricken Widow Arafat, who reiterated Gaddafi's call for an international inquiry to find Arafat's 'murderers' (OJ, are you listening?)

¶ Provided free satellite TV for entire British jail so that Lockerbie bomber can watch Al-Jazeera

¶ Boycotted last week's World Summit on Information in Tunis, to protest short time allotted for him to speak

¶ Met with CIA Deputy Director to discuss counterterrorism, a meeting that included Gaddafi's sinister brother-in-law, wanted in France for the bombing of a civilian airliner that killed 170 people (presumably for his expertise)

¶ Kangaroo court once again postponed final ruling on death sentences of five Bulgarian nurses convicted of AIDS bioterrorism. Sensitive artist Seif Gaddafi said he doesn't believe the nurses are guiltly but...

More Seif wisdom: "I'm not saying we are a democratic state 100%. But we have made Libya a model for the Middle East."

See also The Horse's Mouth

Posted by Jeff at 08:24 PM | Comments (0)

November 16, 2005

GOOD NEWS FROM LIBYA

Sorry, there isn't any.

Posted by Jeff at 06:09 AM | Comments (3)

October 26, 2005

OUR MAN IN TRIPOLI

those were the days: psychocutie / fashionista / trained lawyer aisha gaddafi & fellow sunni nutcase saddam hussein before the dream ended

I'm glad Bush is no longer cozying up to Mideast tyrants. For a moment, I thought his flirting with Colonel Gaddafi was just about oil. A totalitarian state with no civil rights (which famously headed the UN Commission on Human Rights), Libya remains on the US state sponsors of terror list, but the administration said it expected to establish full diplomatic relations before year's end.

In June, the under-secretary for Middle East affairs gushed about Bush's 'great esteem' for Gaddafi. BP, Occidental, & Shell are rushing to pump cheap Libyan oil & gas, which Business Week calls an oil-man's dream.

This week, Gaddafi's son Seif (the semi-normal one) predicted US/Libyan embassies will beng "in the next few days," a statement that caused coughing fits at the State Dept. (Even better: Seif is coming to America toa showing of his paintings, which a Times of London critic said "might be more at home on park railings.")

Seif said 131 political prisoners would be released in September, bizarrely to coincide with the 36th anniversary of his father's coup. (In Libya, membership in a political party constitutes treason.)

Senator Richard Lugar returned from a Libyan junket mission saying Tripoli  had "adopted a definitive position on the matter" of terrorism, hopefully different from its previous definitive position. Lugar also extended Gaddafi's hope that Bush & Rice would soon visit Libya, a place probably well down their list after Mordor & the Debbie Reynolds Movie Memorabilia Museum. Libyan human rights watch:

Journalist Daif al Ghazal found murdered in June after writing articles about government corruption: "Ghazal was tortured, his fingers were cut & he was stabbed with a knife before he was shot dead." (Seif Gaddafi's guide to democracy: "It is the right of a journalist to write what he wants but it also the state's right to question journalists.")

Libyan journalist Abd al-Raziz al-Mansuri has been detained without charge since January, held incommunicado for 4 months, & somehow broke his hip by 'falling' from his cot.

Abdullah Ali al-Sanussi al-Darrat has been imprisoned without trial since 1973, longer than any journalist in the world. Many now suspect he has died or was killed in prison.

Exiled opposition groups held a London conference on the anniversary of a 1996 prison uprising in which at least 100 prisoners were killed after going on a hunger strike, & in which opponents claim 1200 political prisoners were executed & dumped in mass graves.

5 Bulgarian nurses & a Palestinian doctor face execution on trumped-up charges they infected Libyan children with HIV on orders from the Mossad. Gaddafi used their show trial to whip up public hysteria, & a kangaroo court acquitted 9 thugs security officers the nurses claimed tortured them with beatings, electric shock, & rape.

Former army colonel Fathi al-Jahmi was arrested in 2004 after calling Gaddafi a terrorist & has not been seen since. Human rights groups say dozens of Gaddafi critics, including 80 university professors, are in prison, some on death row.

Perhaps they could be represented by Gaddafi's psychocutie daughter 'Dr.' Aisha, who got canned from her job defending fellow Sunni mass-murderer Saddam Hussein. Or she could handle the appeal of homegrown US terrorist Abdurahman Alamoudi, sentenced to 23 years for his part in Gaddafi's 2003 plot to assassinate Crown Prince Abdullah.

Closer to home, she could defend her brother, soccer-wannabe Saadi, set to stand trial in November on sporting fraud charges. Or she could handle the appeal of her other brother, dissolute wastrel Hannibal, for beating his pregnant girlfriend & waving an automatic pistol at French police.

Posted by Jeff at 12:29 AM | Comments (40)

May 31, 2005

BAD NEWS FROM LIBYA: A ROUNDUP OF THE LATEST APPALLING EVENTS IN GADDAFI-LAND

Caving to blackmail, Bulgarian president Georgi Parvanov, announced Bulgaria would pay for the treatment of hundreds of children Libya claims were infected with HIV by 5 Bulgarian nurses & a Palestinian doctor on orders from the Mossad & CIA. Met at the Tripoli airport by protesters (Death devils should be punished!), Parvanov visited children in Benghazi hospital, & made a visit to a local cemetery.

Libya's faux-Supreme Court was set to rule today on the nurses' appeal of their death sentence, but pushed the ruling out to Nov. 15, presumably so Gaddafi can continue extorting money (he previously asked for compensation equal to the $2.7 billion he paid for the Lockerbie bombing). The nurses have spent 6 years in prison on trumped-up charges & confessions they say were extracted by torture, beatings, & rape. Libyan Foreign Minister said executions could be avoided if all parties compromised: "What are we going to gain if they are shot to death?"

In London, Gaddafi the Opera has been postponed until the 2006 season: "It is clear we now have something very special on our hands."

¶ France says it's ready to assist Libya with its nuclear program. It's unclear why Libya, a major oil producer, would need nuclear power, but Chirac has a history of assisting oil-rich Arab tyrants with nuclear egos. In 1974, he brokered a deal to sell up-&-coming madman Saddam Hussein a nuclear reactor, although in 1981 this reactor came to an untimely end.

¶ Seif Gaddafi says Libya will soon have an embassy in Washington, & the US one in Tripoli. This despite the fact that Libya remains on the list of state sponsors of terrorism, & FBI records support Saudi allegations Colonel Gaddafi masterminded a bungled assassination plot against Crown Prince Abdullah in 2003 after a spat at the Arab League conference.

This hasn't dissuaded Democratic Rep. Tom Lantos, who introduced a bill to remove Libya from the terror list. In Jordan, Seif said Libya was willing to talk to Israel, & dismissed rumors of succession: "I don't think the Libyan people are going to accept me because of my personality - I'm very fast, very radical."

¶ In Paris, dissolute wastrel Hannibal Gaddafi was given a 4 month suspended prison sentence & fined $628 for beating his pregnant girlfriend in a February incident in which Gaddafi brandished an unlicensed pistol & smashed up the furniture in a Paris hotel. Last year,  a drunken Gaddafi was stopped driving the wrong way down the Champs Elysees at 100mph, leading to a fight between his bodyguards & French police. Gaddafi has appealed the sentence.

Soccer wannabe Saadi Gaddafi has given up his plans for a takeover of Manchester United, & is now focusing on Juventus: "I told my father it would be like buying the Church of England."

¶ Colonel Gaddafi to sue Amnesty International for claiming Libya continues to jail, torture, & execute political prisoners. Amnesty also criticized the US, comparing Guantanamo to the Soviet gulag, the system of slave-labor camps that held 18 million people. Libya also criticized by Human Rights Watch.

¶ Malta fishermen asked the EU to impose sanctions on Libya in response to its claim of international waters as a 'conservation zone,' which amounts to a windfall for Seif Gaddafi, who owns fishing company RH Marine.

¶ At home, Libyans struggling with unemployment: "Previously, everyone who graduated from high school or universities was employed by the state." Libyans also slammed with price increases as the country ends subsidies & moves towards privatization. Recently, the price of fuel jumped 30%, & the price of electricity doubled.

Posted by Jeff at 12:40 AM | Comments (4)

April 25, 2005

GADDAFI: THE COMPENSATION GAME

sgt. kenneth ford, killed in 1986 labelle disco bombing; libyan musbah eter, sentenced to 12 yrs by german court

Libyan families of victims of the 1986 US airstrike filed a lawsuit seeking material & moral compensation. The committee of victims' families made the announcement during a rally outside Gaddafi's Tripoli residence:

"The blood & lives of the victims will not be allowed to go in vain. Libyans have the right to ask for just compensation from Washington in return for the terrorizing raid, which claimed the lives of children, women & elderly."

The official Libyan news agency ran an editorial defending Libyans' right for US compensation, without noting that the raid was in retaliation for Libya's terror-bombing of the LaBelle nightclub in Berlin 19 years ago April 5, which wounded 229 people & killed 2 US soldiers, 21yo Detroit church deacon Sgt. Kenneth Ford & 25yo Sgt. James Goins.

After the fall of the Berlin Wall, Stasi files led to the arrest of 3 Libyan embassy workers, who were convicted of attempted murder & given lenient sentences. The German woman who planted the explosives was convicted of murder & given 14 years. Reagan address on Libyan bombing here.  Labelle bombing memorial.

DEJA VU: Malta & Libya engaged in diplomatic tug of war over Libya's recent claim to international waters. This echoes Gaddafi's 1973 claim to international waters off the Gulf of Sirte, which led to the US Sixth Fleet shooting down 2 Libyan warplanes & Gaddafi's retaliation bombing of the Labelle nightclub.

In Algiers for the Arab Summit recently, Gaddafi urged Algerians to seek compensation from the French.

¶ Libyan officials denied reports Libya would impose a trade embargo on Bulgaria for not paying compensation for children Libya claims were deliberately infected with HIV on orders from the Mossad. An official had previously stated:

"Libya will boycott Bulgarian companies & shut the doors of all investment & trade opportunities for Bulgarian companies because the Bulgarian government has ignored demands to take responsibility for the action of its citizens in the HIV case."

5 Bulgarian nurses & a Palestinian doctor were sentenced to death by firing squad, but Gaddafi has suggested the sentences could be overturned if Bulgaria would pay compensation equal to the amount Libya paid for the Lockerbie bombing.

Bulgaria has refused, although its Economic Minister arrived in Libya to 'improve economic ties.' US Deputy Defense Minister Paul Wolfowitz offered Washington's help to Bulgaria in the case. For full horror story of Bulgarian nurses, see John Bohannon's When Things Go Wrong in Libya.

¶ Advanced centrifuges for uranium enrichment, destined for Gaddafi's secret $100 million nuclear weapons plant, disappeared in 2003 & may have been sold to Iran.  The entire plant was to be shipped in pieces to Libya via Dr. A.Q. Khan's (r.) network, but US intelligence intercepted a shipment in the Mediterranean, which led to Gaddafi's public renunciation of WMDs.

It now appears that centrifuge rotors, components, & a ton of high-strength aluminum for centrifuge manufacture disappeared, & may have been sold to Iran. Dr. Khan is a national hero in Pakistan & many Pakistani cities have monuments to the creation of the 'Muslim bomb'.

¶ Tripoli now the chic port of call for cruise ships, despite a US travel warning. From the US State Department:  "Libya remains on the State Sponsors of Terrorism List. Americans who decide to travel to Libya despite this Travel Warning should exercise a high level of caution."

¶ Gaddafi abruptly cancelled his visit to Jakarta for the Asian-African summit after Indonesia turned down his request to deliver a religious sermon in a mosque. 'Dozens' of Indonesian Muslims said to have expressed disappointment.  Indonesia's Religious Affairs Minister later denied the story, but it's possible they feared what the famously unpredictable Gaddafi would say in the midst of the summit marking the 50th anniversary of the Bandung Conference. 130 of Gaddafi's security guards had already arrived. Amir Taheri has a eloquent obituary for Bandung's legacy.

¶ Ilija Loncarevic has returned as Libya's national soccier coach, a year after being sacked by Saadi Gaddafi (r.). Loncarevic's return was engineered by Saadi's brother Mohammed, who took over as Libyan Football Federation chairman after Saadi's resignation. Saadi still bidding $300 million for Liverpool FC, & upping the ante by offering a $120 million new stadium.

¶ US military would like to establish official ties with Libya’s armed forces if Libya can satisfy Bush administration it has renounced its sponsorship of terrorism, according to second-in-command at US European Command. Wheelus air base near Tripoli was once headquarters for 17th Air Force of US Air Forces Europe. Gen. Charles Wald:  "I think it's going to happen."

Posted by Jeff at 12:38 PM | Comments (3)

April 12, 2005

THIN LINE BETWEEN ART & TERROR

why is this man smiling: gaddafi with bodacious bodyguard

Scottish-Asian playwright Shah Khan is hard at work on the libretto for Gaddafi: the Opera. Music will be composed by Asian Dub Foundation, the show will be directed by Antonia Bird, & a film version will be helmed by Mike Figgis. Here's a sample of Khan's moral clarity:

"Gaddafi is a nutter, we know that, but so was Reagan. So is Bush, so is Blair. Gaddafi is a nutter because he blows people up. Do you not think they blow people up?"

The opera will center on Reagan's bombing of Tripoli in 1986, altho no word if Khan will mention this was in retaliation for Libya's terror-bombing of a Berlin nightclub. Even better: Khan admits he still hasn't written the Lockerbie bombing into the story, for which Libya has paid $1.4 billion in compensation, & says he doesn't know what to believe about it.

For enlightenment, Khan went straight to the horse's mouth: Gaddafi's son Seif, who said 'All world leaders are terrorists.' On Lockerbie, Seif says flatly 'We did not do this.' On the 1984 murder of London policewoman Yvonne Fletcher, which Libya also accepted responsibility for, Seif chokes up: 'I am ashamed.'

Seif, aka the Sensitive One, d an exhibition of 40 of his paintings in Tokyo. Titled The Desert is Not Silent (official website here), the show includes a collection of Libyan archeological artifacts, & will also hit Korea, Australia & the US later this year. PR blurb:

"Seif Gaddafi allows the immediacy of his raw materials to speak for him, to tell intimate stories of life in the desert, & the powerful emotions that it evokes in him. He melds the ancient & historic artistic traditions of Libya with an intense feeling for contemporary issues. He is a son of the endless deserts of Libya."

Uncharitable review from the Globe & Mail:

"Ever since Nero, there has been a depressing connection between bad art & megalomaniac regimes. As a painter he is not even a gifted amateur; his sentimentality is only exceeded by his technical incapacity. All those yellow suns, red roses & white horses don't even succeed in being eccentric or intense, just incredibly undistinguished."

The art critic for the Times said the paintings "might be more at home on park railings."

In Japan, Seif met with the Japanese PM ("We are in real need of Japanese help") & spoke out about North Korea, saying the Stalinist state needs to be given incentives & rewards to give up its nuclear program, an idea that's never occurred to anyone before.

Slam Sports reports the status of Saadi Gaddafi's career as a soccer star is still a mystery. Saadi rumored to have made $300 million bid for Liverpool FC to add to his collection.

In Tripoli, work began on a $100 million Center for Infectious Disease Control in Africa, part of Gaddafi's plan to put Libya on the cutting edge of science & technology. Potential problems with this plan: Gaddafi's unorthodox views on disease (said malarial mosquitoes & tsetse flies were God's angels protecting Africa from Westerners) & the 5 Bulgarian nurses sentenced to death by firing squad for allegedly infecting Libyan children with AIDS on orders of the Mossad. 

John Bohannon quizzed Khaled Deeb, Libya's unctuous Al Jazeera correspondent on the nurses' charges they were tortured. Deeb: "They are lying! I know they are lying because I know 110% that they are guilty. Why would my government use torture to make them say things if they are already guilty?"

Colonel Gaddafi condemned a UN vote to refer Sudanese accused of war crimes in Darfur to the International Criminal Court as a violation of Sudan's independence: "That decision aims at fanning the conflict in Darfur. It is an affront to all Sudanese & a blatant violation of Sudan's independence."

Posted by Jeff at 06:20 AM | Comments (4)

April 01, 2005

GADDAFI & THE VAST BULGARIAN CONSPIRACY

Libyan Supreme Court will rule May 31 on whether it will uphold death sentence of 5 Bulgarian nurses & Palestinian doctor convicted of intentionally infecting 380 Libyan children with HIV under orders from the Mossad & CIA. The nurses, who have been detained since 1999, say their confessions were extracted by beatings, rape, & electric shocks.

EU activists say infections were caused by Libyan Health Ministry's failure to screen blood. HIV discoverer Luc Montaigner testified that the children were infected in 1997, before the nurses arrived. Outside a hearing this week, entirely spontaneous protesters chanted Death! Death to the killers of our children. Oh Leader! Liquidate them as you liquidated monarchy rule!

Colonel Gaddafi: "The Bulgarians have killed our children. I swear by Allah that some Western officials come to me & say, 'We want to take them back today, so release them.' The West told us the opinions of your people do not interest us, our people are sheep & that we have no public opinion." 

Seif Gaddafi contradicted his father, saying the women would not be executed & might be extradited to Bulgaria. Colonel Gaddafi said he would free nurses if Bulgaria paid compensation equal to the amount Libya paid to relatives of the victims of the 1988 Lockerbie bombing. Bulgaria declined the ransom, but may write off some of Libya's debt to obtain nurses' release. (The trial of 10 Libyan police whom the nurses claim tortured them was postponed for a second time.)

¶ Saadi Gaddafi has resigned as head of the Libyan Football Federation. A spokesman said this had nothing to do with the fact that the Libyan coach dropped Gaddafi from the lineup in last week's 4-1 loss to Egypt in their World Cup Qualifier, where Libyan fans ripped up chairs & hurled them at Egyptian police.

Saadi, the world's most famous non-playing soccer star, traveled with the Libyan team to Australia where he didn't play but found time to wine & dine Nicole Kidman; he's also registered with Perugia, but has yet to play with them either. (Kidman on dinner: "That was business.")

¶ Colonel Gaddafi wrapped up his 9-day visit to Algeria, which he praised for throwing out the French & suggested Algerians seek compensation from France.  Gaddafi: "I cannot describe the warm welcome & the sentiments of fraternity I was surrounded by during my stay in my [sic] country Algeria. It's a holy land." (He also took time for a dig at the Saudis: "American officials I met told me that the Saudis are dirty & closed-minded.")

Gaddafi's extended visit & vast entourage worked the patience of his hosts: Between Hospitality & Irritation read a headline in Le Soir d'Algerie. Gaddafi was also awarded an honorary doctorate in Social Sciences by Algiers University. Some wisdom Gaddafi delivered to Arab League conference:

• "I am a philosopher. And I shouldn't be here among all of you."
• “The West Bank was Jordan's, & Gaza belonged to Egypt since 1948. Why didn't you establish a Palestinian state then? Where was this problem until 1967?”
• Said Sharon was not an enemy of the Arab world, but of the Israeli people.
• Said that during visit to Brussels, EU leaders talked to him about women's rights & circumcision instead of international affairs.
• "You are all corrupt. You are all opposed to reform."

Mubarek's retort: "Next time you come to lecture us make sure you have paid your fees."

Back home, Gaddafi was welcomed by cheering crowds. The Palestinians, meanwhile, asked for an apology after Gaddafi called them idiots: "The Palestinian people have enough headaches & do not have enough aspirin." The Lebanese were more pointed: "Shut up! Silence is golden, Moammar!" Israeli Foreign Ministry spokesman on Gaddafi's idiot remark: "It takes one to know one."

¶ Philomathean reports on Gaddafi's imperial & idiotic Great Man Made River project to pump water out of underground aquifers across the Sahara Desert:

"The final cost of the project is expected to exceed $32 billion, enough to pay for a dozen desalination plants. A reporter who analyzed the project concluded that 'Food could be flown in from Fauchon in Paris at a fraction of the price of the Man-Made River. Pumping distant Saharan water costs almost as much as using bottles of Perrier for irrigation."

Posted by Jeff at 12:13 AM | Comments (7)

March 20, 2005

ON THE REBOUND

"Nicole Kidman shared an intimate Sydney dinner with the playboy son of Libyan leader Colonel Muammar Gaddafi. Al-Saadi Gaddafi, 31, wined & dined the Oscar-winning actress, 37, during a private dinner on the top floor of the InterContinental Hotel to discuss the investment potential of the Australian film industry. He had originally planned the ultimate setting for the dinner – hiring the State Suite for $15,000 & filling it with fresh flowers & candles – but opted for the 31st floor lounge instead."

Gaddafi said to have presented Kidman with a diamond bracelet on the occasion: "He seemed disappointed when Nicole left, as romance was clearly off the menu."

In other Oz news, Seif Gaddafi became involved in a sex & gun scandal during a trip to Queensland in 2002. Four prostitutes said they had been hired for a three-hour sex party, & a tour boat operator claimed one of Gaddafi's entourage pulled a gun. The boat operator wrote to PM John Howard, asking why the Libyans were allowed to carry firearms.

Crown Prince Abdullah set to attend Arab Summit in Algiers this week. This should be interesting, as Abdullah's public dissing of Gaddafi at the 2003 summit allegedly led to Gaddafi's bungled assassination plot. UPDATE: Abdullah has declined to attend, due to Gaddafi's presence.

Meanwhile, Gaddafi said to have offered money to the family of Lebanon's top Shia cleric, Moussa al Sadr, who disappeared mysteriously on a trip to Libya in 1978 (the Gaddafis are Sunnis).

"Many in Lebanon believe Gaddafi ordered al-Sadr & his aides killed after a feud over money stemming from the Libyan leader's funding of militias during Lebanon's 1975-90 civil war. The al-Sadr family strongly believes the imam remains in a Libyan jail."

Al-Sadr's family rejected the offer, & Gaddafi failed to appear for a legal hearing in Lebanon last week. The family's lawyer said the trial would proceed in absentia: "The case will be treated as one of a fugitive from justice. Gaddafi is a man wanted by Lebanese law." A 1986 investigation concluded that Gaddafi had sent an imposter to Rome to make it appear al-Sadr had left the country.

In more trouble for Gaddafi, 150 Iranian MPs signed a letter urging their government to use all means to expose the truth behind the 1978 kidnapping  & punish those responsible for his abduction. (Sadr was born in Iran.)

Gaddafi's rehabilitation now complete, the US is expected to refull diplomatic relations with Libya this year.

Profile of Moussa al Sadr

Posted by Jeff at 09:38 AM | Comments (12)

March 14, 2005

HOUSE GADDAFI: MURDER, MAYHEM, & BLACKMAIL

Saadi Gaddafi, subject of a gushing profile in the NY Times, is jockeying to buy the controlling share of a well-known British soccer club for $300 million. In the last months of infamous 2-year contract with Perugia, in which he's played exactly one match, Saadi is coy about which club, as the Brit soccer establishment is queasy now that Chelsea is owned by Russian billionaire Roman Abramovich & Fulham by Mohammad al-Fayed.

Saadi (who didn't make the cut for Libya's upcoming World Cup qualifier against Egypt) claims he single-handedly reintroduced soccer to Libya after his father banned professional sports & discouraged spectator sports ("sport is a public activity that must be practiced rather than watched").

Beside being rife with errors obvious even to lowly bloggers, the Times piece treats Saadi like a legitimate if colorful businessman, when he's essentially Uday Hussein. His father-in-law is chief of Libya's sinister security apparatus, & his family has simply looted the country & squirreled billions of dollars away in European banks while Libya remains impoverished & unfree.

¶ One of the catalysts in Libya's decision to abandon WMDs was getting caught red-handed. In August 2003, US operatives in Kuala Lumpur watched as agents of Abdul Qadeer Khan loaded 5 containers of nuclear equipment onto a ship bound for Tripoli. This was just 5 months after Seif Gaddafi sat down with British intelligence to poo-poo talk of Libyan WMDs.

In a crack intelligence op, US agents tracked the ship from Malaysia to Dubai, where the containers were moved to another ship, tracked it thru the Suez, & intercepted it in Italy. Realizing the US knew far more than he thought, Gaddafi quickly changed his tune.

¶ Around this time, Gaddafi is said to hatched a scheme to assassinate Crown Prince Abdullah by making it look like an Al Qaeda plot, after an exchange of insults at an Arab League summit:

"Gaddafi accused the Saudi prince of 'making a pact with the devil' by supporting U.S. military forces in the region. Abdullah responded: 'Your lies precede you & your grave is in front of you.'

In the course of the bumbling plot, the Libyans transferred the money to the wrong bank in Medina, drew the attention of Saudi bank regulators by withdrawing huge sums of cash, & were left in the lurch when their courier got cold feet & fled. Gaddafi denies the charges, but hasn't explained what 13 Libyan agents were doing in Mecca with a million dollars trying to contact Al Qaeda (presumably not a difficult thing to do in Saudi Arabia).

¶ Gaddafi now trying to blackmail Bulgaria over case of 5 Bulgarian nurses Libya claims intentionally infected children with HIV on orders of CIA & Mossad. Libya now says it might reconsider the death sentences if the children's families were compensated by Bulgaria. Gaddafi ignored the EU's warning this week to immediately release the nurses, just as he previously ignored John Le Carre,  Ian McKellen, & Noam Chomsky.

Posted by Jeff at 10:47 PM | Comments (7)

March 03, 2005

GADDAFI WTF: THREATENS TO WITHDRAW FROM UN

¶ Colonel Gaddafi says Libya & other countries will withdraw from the UN unless the Security Council is scrapped & its powers transferred to the motley rabble General Assembly. Gaddafi called the Security Council "an ugly, forceful, & horrible instrument of dictatorship — an executioner’s whip with no appeal against its judgment, even if its judgment is unfair, biased & harmful.”

It's easy to see why Gaddafi would want this. According to Freedom House' 2005 Table of Independent Countries (pdf) only 89 of 192 countries are rated free. Countries rated free voted with the US 34% of the time, while countries rated unfree voted with the US only 16% of the time. In 1974, the General Rabble adopted Resolution 3379 which equated Zionism with racism, & in 1975 voted permanent member status to a terrorist army, the PLO, with lasting repercussions.

Bizarrely, Gaddafi has also applied for a seat on the dictatorial Security Council. Highlights of Gaddafi's speech to Libya's faux-parliament:

• On the US: "We don't say love the Americans. We are talking policies, & (on that level) there is no problem or animosity. We are not enemies. We are not allies. We are not agents. We hope one day we will be friends."


• On Libya's strongman government: "A country that is weak in front of terrorism harms the international community. The power that is responsible for security must be strong enough to make people feel safe."


• On the UN:  "A Hyde Park Speaker's Corner, a fantasy," & a waste of money to send delegates "to take part in its ridiculous funny act."

Gaddafi also called for economic liberalization in Libya including a law banning nationalization, warning that oil majors would "not invest billions if the economy is not stable and if they are not certain their possessions will not be nationalized" (again):

"We must liberalize power, labor & economic activity without exploitation so that Libyans can choose freely to take part in an economic activity of their choice. The stability of political & economic institutions would give Libya credibility in the world."

¶ Dissolute wastrel Hannibal Gaddafi will be summoned for questioning about an alleged attack in which he allegedly beat a woman 8 months pregnant & waved an unlicensed automatic pistol at police.  Aline Skaf, 24, was taken to a hospital & treated for bruises & "psychological trauma". Police were subsequently called to another hotel where Gaddafi barricaded himself in his suite & was smashing up the furniture.

Gaddafi, 28, has previously escaped prosecution in France for his many incidents by bluffing diplomatic immunity, but no more:

"Officials said Gaddafi held a diplomatic passport at the time of the alleged attack but was not a member of the Libyan embassy staff or on a diplomatic mission & therefore had no diplomatic immunity."

¶ Hannibal's brother, delusional soccer wannabe Saadi, fresh from his PR jaunt to Australia, is said to be on the market for a posh Darling Point luxury apartment prior tong  an investment office in Sydney:

"Gaddafi flew out last week after a 12-day sport, trade & night-clubbing extravaganza. In between canapes at Bondi Icebergs with Tom Jones, lunch at Otto & talks with Federal Government ministers, he didn't find time to play in either of the two games scheduled for Libya's national soccer team."

Gaddafi is captain of the Libyan football team, lack of talent notwithstanding:

"Opponents in Libya were said to run backwards rather than get themselves into the unfortunate position of actually having to tackle him. Gaddafi does not take kindly to critics. He sacked the Libyan national coach after the man made the foolish error of dropping him & describing him as useless."

¶ A kindler, gentler Libya: Shortly after his release from prison last March, Fathi al-Jahmi called Colonel Gaddafi a war criminal & a terrorist on Arabic TV. Jahmi was arrested again the next day & has not been heard from since:

"Human rights organizations & Libyan dissident groups outside the country say dozens of Gaddafi critics are languishing behind bars, including more than 80 university professors who have called for democracy & the rule of law. Some are reported to be on death row."

¶ Tours of Roman Africa are the hot new thing, such as the long-buried city Leptis Magna:

"Most of it was preserved under the sand dunes until it was excavated & rebuilt in the 20s and 30s. The city had its heyday in the 3rd Century after Emperor Septimus Severus, who was born there but died & was buried in York (then Eboracum under the Romans), returned on a visit & began an extensive building scheme. The population grew to about 70,000. Severus has a magnificent four-way arch built to his glory."

See also Classical Cities of Libya tour

Posted by Jeff at 09:04 AM | Comments (28)

February 24, 2005

GADDAFI'S AMAZONIAN GUARD

 

6/12/98: "A female bodyguard sacrificed her life to save Colonel Gaddafi from assassination. The beautiful security girl was one of a 40-strong, all-woman unit of personal guards who are trained killers & also claim to be virgins.

"She threw herself on top of the Libyan leader when rebelsd fire on his motorcade, & died riddled with bullets. Seven other women bodyguards were also seriously wounded. A source said: 'Gaddafi was deeply distressed. Aisha, the woman who died, was his top bodyguard.'

"Gaddafi surrounds himself with handpicked female bodyguards to foil such attacks. All of them swear an oath that they will give their lives for him. They never leave his side, night or day, & he insists they remain virgins. There is no shortage of volunteers for what is seen as a prestigious job. A special training college puts recruits through a tough program. Girls who don't drop out emerge as trained killers, experts with firearms & martial arts. Gaddafi makes the final selection &, despite the virginal tag, rumors abound that he demands their sexual favors."

New opera based on the life of Libyan leader Moammar Gaddafi, featuring  rapper as Gaddafi & chorus of all-female bodyguards;
Brawl between Gaddafi's women bodyguards & Egyptian security;
Gaddafi humiliated when notorious female bodyguards unceremoniously disarmed by Ethiopian Security

Gaddafi on women: "Women should be trained for combat, so that they do not become easy prey for their enemies." In the West, "the situation for women is hardly enviable: she has left home but only to confront a difficult fate, driving trucks & trains."

Posted by Jeff at 09:02 AM | Comments (24)

February 15, 2005

GADDAFI REPORT: SAADI & ZELJKO, BFF!

¶ Delusional soccer wannabe Saadi Gaddafi has revealed former Perugia teammate, Aussie Zeljko Kalac (r.) told him to quit after just 2 days in camp: "He was very friendly (so) I asked him to come to my room & give me some advice." Kalac told Saadi to go home. In Sydney, Gaddafi said "Every day he sends me messages on the mobile phone. He say, 'Oh, I wish I was with you, in my city, in my country'." Saadi adores his new best friend, whom he calls Spider: "He's super funny. The most funny guy I have seen in my life."

Saadi also said his father is tired of indulging his delusions:

'My father wants me to come back to Libya. He doesn't want me to play football, he says, 'You are bigger than that, you have to be something more than a player.' But this is my passion. I say, 'OK, just let me finish my contract.' Maybe then I can be Libyan ambassador in the United States, or have some other kind of very sensitive position.  To retire from football is a very big decision for me, because I love it so much. I want to play forever. It is in my heart."

¶ Gaddafi to the rescue? Colonel Gaddafi said to have responded warmly to South Korea's request he visit North Korea in bid to persuade Kim Jong-Il to abandon nuclear weapons. This would probably not be a good idea, as North Korea denounced Gaddafi as 'coward' & 'fool' when Gaddafi renounced production of WMDs.  Gaddafi also gave US top-secret info on atomic weapons shared by  North Korea & Libya

¶ Gaddafi lobbying to block transfer of Lockerbie bomber Abdel Baset al-Megrahi to a different Scottish prison, requesting he serve his life sentence in Libya or another Muslim country. Libya has complained to both Britain & the UN, claiming that transferring Megrahi breaches the agreement by which Libya handed Megrahi over for trial.  Libya is particularly concerned about Meghrahi serving time with inmates scheduled for release: "If the other people around him are ready to go home that would drain him psychologically."

¶ Gaddafi warned that in event of foreign military intervention, he would back out of the mediation to end genocide in Darfur. Reacting to Kofi Annan's suggestion that NATO should intervene in Darfur: "The brother Kofi Annan's statement is very dangerous & stops us from pursuing the African efforts. If his statement were to be implemented that will make Sudan a second Iraq." (As opposed to a second Rwanda, I suppose.)

¶ Faux-American Indian Ward Churchill met with Libyan leader Moammar Gadhafi in Tripoli in 1983 — 2 years after the U.S. banned Americans from traveling to Libya. Churchill made the trip as emissary of the American Indian Movement  & sought diplomatic support from the Libyan strongman.  Churchill defended the visit, arguing it wasn't that bad & that he had not, "requested arms from the Libyan government."

¶"Only two countries have the capacity to double their oil production - Libya & Iraq." The high quality of Libya's low-sulfur crude & quick travel time to U.S. - half the time it takes Saudi crude to reach Gulf Coast - adds to the attraction. Industry executives eager to see what properties will be up for grabs when Libya hosts next bidding contest next month.

Posted by Jeff at 01:03 PM | Comments (2)

February 07, 2005

BAD BEHAVIOR: HANNIBAL GADDAFI

hannibal gaddafi's squeeze, aline skaf

¶ Dissolute wastrel Hannibal Gaddafi the subject of formal French complaint after 2 more altercations. On Feb. 1, police responded to incidents in 2 Paris hotels in which Gaddafi, 28, allegedly pulled a 9mm handgun. Gaddafi also allegedly assaulted his pregnant girlfriend, model Aline Skaf, 24, sending her to the hospital: "Gaddafi allegedly beat his female companion when she refused him access to a room at the InterContinental Hotel."

Gaddafi then checked into the Royal Monceau Hotel & police were again called when he began smashing furniture.  French police said Gaddafi did not have a license for the gun. French police union official Frederic Lagache: "This boy is a nutter & a rare case. He sees his immunity like a free pass." Police later ascertained that Hannibal does NOT have diplomatic immunity in France.

Hannibal left for Cagen, where he's enrolled at Cagen Business School. Even there, Danish police were called 3 weeks ago to a violent incident involving  Gaddafi at a Libyan diplomat's residence in Cagen, but police were unable to intervene due to the building's diplomatic status.

Last September, a drunken Gaddafi was stopped after speeding through several red lights on the Champs-Elysees, an incident in which one of his bodyguards attacked a policeman. Gaddafi also attacked Rome police with a fire extinguisher, & crashed his yacht into a wharf in Sardinia.

¶ Delusional soccer wannabe Saadi Gaddafi arrived in Australia as head of the Libyan soccer team to drum up business for Libya in Oz. Saadi: "I plan toa bureau for the sponsorship of Australian companies for their business in Libya. I would be the main promoter for Australian investment in Libya & Libyan investment in Australia."

Saadi has done rather well along these lines, having a personal worth estimated at billions, since his family looted controls all of  Libya's nationalized industries. Saadi previously fired the Libyan soccer coach who said he was 'useless,' & had a famously truncated career with Perugia in which he didn't play a single game & was suspended for failing a doping test.

¶ Seif Gaddafi, the only son worth a lick, attended the World Economic Forum in Davos, where Jay Nordlinger notes the idea of republican government seems 'impossibly foreign to him'.Yet Gaddafi does get some of it: 

"We Arabs have lost all our wars against Israel because Israel is democratic, & we are undemocratic. In other words (Gaddafi continues), in one of our states, the worst general becomes army chief of staff, because he is no threat to carry out a coup d'état.  Democracy, on the other hand, is a competitive mechanism — and that's why Israel wins."

Which is why no Arab army is a match for a Western army. Seif's other wisdom: Libyan Jews in Israel should come home, even though Libya kicked them out: "They lived in Libya for hundreds of years, & speak our language, & share our mentality — they ought to contribute to the modernization of Libya." Seif's hobbies:

• Tigers: "I have four big cats, including two extremely rare White Bengali tigers, which live with me in Tripoli. I love playing with my tigers, although they can sometimes be a little rough."
• Falcons: "I often go out into the desert with friends & we hunt together, usually for bustards."
• Painting: "I love painting. I paint mainly with oils, & paint in a particular style which combines realism, surrealism, impressionism & collage."
• Athletics: "I like working out, & I also try to keep myself fit by swimming & playing football on the beach."

¶ Khadija Khali, president of the French Union of Muslim Women, will visit Colonel Gaddafi to call for the release of 5 Bulgarian nurses facing the death sentence in Libya. 5 Bulgarian nurses and a Palestinian doctor were sentenced to death in May 2004 for allegedly having infected 380 Libyan children with HIV-infected blood &  causing the death of 47 others. Khali: "I am a mother & will ask him in the name of God to release our children. Those poor girls are not guilty."

¶ Oakland's Bush-bashing rockers Heavenly States failed in their quest to become the first Western rock band to play Libya. Libyan officials said the group was denied permission to perform because they were on a tourist visa, leading to speculation: was the gig axed due to the group's flaming riffs on George Bush? Lead singer/idiot moonbat Ted Nesseth: "Part of the reason to come here was to dispel the rumors. I can say it's safer to be here than in Oakland." Unless of course the security services decide to lock you up & throw away the key.

¶ Reed Scowan has a fascinating piece on Libyan caravan tours of the Sahara: "Fezzan was described by one explorer as the most beautiful desert in the world — the historic corridor through which camel caravans carried trade goods &  slaves between the Mediterranean &  Timbuktu & beyond.

"The Acacus is a spectacular landscape of sand &  rock formations, which served as the canvas for an astounding collection of rock art 4000 years old. It depicts people &  animals — giraffes, elephants, rhinoceros, cattle, dogs — that lived in the area when it  resembled the forested & savannah lands we associate with central Africa. To the north is the Ubari Sand Sea, the classic sand desert in constantly changing colors & forms, broken only by the rare oasis of palm trees & a well or a very small lake..."

See also Peter Boekamp Fezzan Photogallery; Gaddafi postage stamps; Fezzan tours

Posted by Jeff at 04:58 AM | Comments (11)

January 31, 2005

GADDAFI REPORT: THE LATEST ON LIBYA'S ANSWER TO THE OSBOURNES

Gaddafi on allegations of complicity in plot to assassinate Crown Prince Abdullah: "Accusing Libya of being a country that sponsors terrorism is a very dangerous thing. That has psychological repercussions. Libya could argue, 'Since I am still on the terrorist list, why not commit terrorism, which I am accused of anyway. Why should I pay the price without getting something in return?'"

On the possibility of Iraqi-style elections in Libya: "What for? We have surpassed that stage you are presently in. All the people are in power now. Do you want them to regress & elect somebody to replace them? Libyans are in paradise."

On Libya's glorious history:  "The Libyans helped liberate Italy from fascism. The Italians don't like to remember this—the black side of the story. But the Libyans suffered as much as the Italians from fascism."

On the Axis of Evil: “The North Korean nuclear problem is a serious &  dangerous issue, &  North Korea & Iran should take some measures Libya took."

Libya awarded its first contracts to U.S. companies in 18 years.15 licenses offered for onshore & offshore oil & gas exploration & will offer 40 more next month. Libya produces 1.6m barrels per day & hopes to raise this to 2.1m  by 2010. French financier: "Libya is very strange - people do not want to make decisions, & everything seems to go to the very top, to Gaddafi."

Son Seif al-Islam: "My father has been promoting the idea of direct democracy in Libya for almost 26 years now."

Unidentified Western consultant on the Colonel: "He's just like George Bush. He's a conviction politician. Sometimes he's fanatical, but he really believes what he believes."

Seif on Libyan politics: "We don't have an opposition - there is no opposition."

On succeeding his father:  "My father does not have any official position in the Libyan state. He is not a king or a president or a prime minister & thus does not have a job to transfer to anyone. He is the Guide of the Revolution. And that is something unique to him, something that cannot be transmitted to any heir by an act of will. In any case my father does not believe in hereditary rule."

Seif on Arab denial of the Holocaust: "It is incorrect to deny the Holocaust because I think the Holocaust is a fact." (Flashback - the Colonel on Israel: "Israel is nothing but a mirage, something that does not exist.")

Seif on insurgent killers in Iraq: "The result is clear, that it's an illegal occupation & therefore people should resist it."

Oakland's own Heavenly States first rock band to play Libya, & first Westerners since Anita Bryant c. 1963. Lead singer Ted Nesseth: "I'm going to be the new Elvis in Arabic lands." (Nesseth in 2004: "If I were John Kerry, I would go up to Dave Matthews & say, Dude, please don't tour the swing states. You're crampin' our f*ckin' style.")

See also Libya's Modern-Sounding Son; Anita Bryant Fact Page

Posted by Jeff at 06:46 AM | Comments (6)

December 07, 2004

THE WISDOM OF COLONEL GADDAFI

From Team America: 'Gays, straights, whites, & spades, everyone has AIDS! My grandma & my old dog Blue, the Pope has got it & so do you! Come on everybody we've got quiltin' to do. AIDS, AIDS, AIDS, AIDS...'

The Colonel on AIDS: "AIDS, AIDS, AIDS! We do not understand anything other. It is terrorism. It is psychological warfare. The AIDS is a peaceful virus. If you remain clean, there does not have a problem." Again: "If you are straight, you have nothing to fear from AIDS." (AIDS is leading cause of death among South African women, few none of whom are infected via lesbian sex.)

Told leaders of African Union they should not 'worry about tsetse flies and mosquitoes' [carriers of malaria & sleeping sickness], saying they were 'God's armies' protecting Africa from its enemies, ie, foreigners: "If they come here, they will get malaria & sleeping sickness."

Invented world's safest car, the Rocket, rocket-shaped 5 passenger vehicle which features "air bags that deploy all around the interior in an accident, a collapsible bumper & a system of anti-roll rocker panels."

The Colonel on the UN: Wants Libya to have permanent seat on UN Security Council. Says authority to wage war should be transferred to General Assembly. Wants UN to support Committee of Wise Men to settle world's tiffs, comprised of Bill Clinton, Mikhail Gorbachev, & Nelson Mandela

The Colonel calls for establishment of Israteen, not Jewish teenybopper mag but single nation comprised of Israel, West Bank, & Gaza. In Cairo speech, criticized Arabs for being gullible dupes:

"We have believed the US & then we saw Congress calling for the partition of Saudi Arabia into cantons, controlling it & closing of mosques & religious schools, & also talking about its role & the Wahabi movement" in so-called terrorism.

The Colonel only Arab leader to support Kurdish nationalism: "Kurds are an oppressed nation & their homeland is occupied. It is a legitimate right to establish an independent Kurdish state." (2002)

Awarded Moammar Gaddafi human rights award to Hugo Chavez. Previous winners: Fidel Castro & Nelson Mandela. Chavez: "I feel bathed in honor."

From moonbat analysis of the Colonel's collected ramblings, The Green Book:

"Gaddafi sees representative democracy as necessarily demagogic & fraudulent, as it encourages the development of a party system in which the people are broken up into interest groups which compete one against the other, undoing whatever constructive work may have been done, to the detriment of the nation as a whole. The relevance of this critique is obvious to the contemporary world."

Exactly! So much more progressive to do away with those oppressive political parties, & replace them with a totalitarian dictatorship!

UPDATE: Michael Totten inexplicably went on a luxury tour of Libya. Guess he couldn't get tix for Mordor. But his photoessay is the bomb! (Via Commonplace Commonsense)

Posted by Jeff at 01:51 PM | Comments (0)

December 06, 2004

GADDAFI: THE COMEDY

Delusional megalomaniac Saadi Gaddafi

Having flamed out trying to buy himself a career in soccer, Colonel Gaddafi's son Saadi has a new hobby: impersonating a Hollywood mogul. Saadi's set up a $100m vanity corp called World Navigator Entertainment, which like all his other toys, is financed by the Natl Oil Corporation of Libya.

Saadi originally approached Harvey Weinstein at the Venice Film Festival hoping for backing on a biopic of The Colonel. Weinstein told him he'd discuss terms once Libya recognized Israel. Instead, Saadi settled on Italian producer Silvio Sardi, whose previous credits include Honolulu Baby, about a man stranded on an island of man-hungry babes.

Partner Thomas Zeumer on Saadi: "The first thing I can say is that he doesn't like violent movies. Saadi loves romantic comedies," & is said to be especially fond of Hugh Grant & Julia Roberts. This is welcome news, given that in 1996 Saadi ordered his bodyguards tofire on a crowd at a Libyan soccer match that was shouting slogans against him, killing several people.

Recall that soccer wannabe Saadi previously bought his way onto Perugia under florid coach Luciano Gaucci, never one to miss a publicity stunt. Saadi never played a single game, swanned around Perugia in his Lamborghini with celebrity coach/playboy Diego Maradona & was finally kicked off for failing a doping test.

Perhaps one of Saadi's new projects can be the film version of Gaddafi: the Opera. Beautiful Atrocities thinks Harvey Fierstein would be perfect for the role (provided, of course, that Libya recognizes Israel).

See also: LIBYAN GOTHIC

Posted by Jeff at 09:14 AM | Comments (0)

October 18, 2004

LIBYAN GOTHIC

The Colonel's kids: Hannibal, Aisha, Saadi, & Seif

The debauched spawn of Colonel Muammar Gaddafi have been behaving badly again. This time it's the old horror's youngest, Mutassim, aka Hannibal. French police arrested 2 of his bodyguards last month after his Porsche zipped through several red lights on the Champs-Elysees at 100mph around 2AM.

When police tried to question him, 2 of Gaddafi's imperial storm troopers assaulted them, injuring 1 cop & trashing a police transmitter. According to the cops, Gaddafi's Porsche reeked of booze, & Gaddafi was 'unable to speak coherently.'

In case you're keeping track, this is the same Hannibal who was escorted to the Rome airport after attacking police with a fire extinguisher at the Hilton, & was involved in another Rome fracas that sent 6 photographers to the hospital (which could explain why photos of the international drunk are few & far between).

He's also unwelcome in Sardinia, where he was thrown out of a nightclub for screaming at waiters, blocked a disco with his Lamborghini, blasted music all nite from his 70 foot luxury yacht the Che Guevara (which flies the Cuban flag) then blaring the Muslim call to prayer after a night of hard partying.

Brother Saadi continues his fantasy life as a soccer player. He sacked the Libyan national soccer coach who described him as useless; Libyan players were said to run backwards in order to avoid having to tackle him. Having delusions of playing for Manchester United & being Africa's greatest soccer player, he signed with Perugia in 2003.

Saadi promptly failed a drug test, perhaps modeling too closely on his coach Ben Johnson, who was stripped of his Olympic gold for the same reason. (Billionaire Saadi did concede that he wasn't actually being paid by Perugia.)

Seif, the Colonel's only semi-respectable scion, negotiated unsuccessfully for Kenneth Bigley's release, having earlier obtained the release of hostages in the Philippines & Mali. This week he announced that Libya was separating from 'the so-called Middle East' & demilitarizing.

Seif previously distinguished himself by keeping a pair of Bengal tigers in his Vienna bachelor digs & becoming fast friends with right-winger ( & fellow Jew-hater) Jorge Haider. The Colonel himself is in Berlin this week for rehabilitation, where he startled Gerhard Schroeder by demanding compensation for landmines left by Erwin Rommel 60 years ago.

No news on swanky moll 'Doctor' Aisha, last seen heading to Baghdad to assist in the legal defense of fellow Sunni gangster Saddam Hussein.

Posted by Jeff at 05:12 AM | Comments (0)

July 12, 2004

ABSOLUTELY AISHA

Beautiful Atrocity Aisha Gaddafi

Saddam Hussein, who's been desperately trying to get the toothless UN involved in his trial to ensure a Milosovic-style circus, got a PR boost last week when Libyan glamourpuss Aisha Gaddafi signed on to his legal team. The only daughter of strongman Mohammar Gaddafi, Aisha is variously referred to as Doctor Gaddafi & "the Claudia Schiffer of North Africa" (by the Italian press).

Named for the Prophet Mohammed's 6-year-old child bride, Aisha, 27, is a fashion plate like Raghad Hussein, holds a law degree from Al Fatih University in Tripoli, & worked to attract tourism in Libya, which is not exactly a tourist Mecca. She shops in London & Paris & made a fiery speech in Hyde Park in which she proclaimed the IRA fredeom fighters.

Aisha made her international debut in 1996, when the Colonel took her on a trip to South Africa and she appeared on TV with Nelson Mandela. In 2000, she flew to Baghdad to meet with Hussein, announcing to reporters that her high-profile jaunt was a challenge to the UN sanctions as well as the American & British air patrols that frustrated Hussein's genocidal schemes against the Kurds & Shias (the Gaddafis are Sunnis, like Hussein).

Aisha's fondness for terrorists & mass murderers might be frowned upon in a more conventional family, but a glance at her siblings shows why the Colonel might indulge her.

Al Saadi, 31. Nickname: the hooligan. Compared to Uday Hussein. Married to daughter of Libyan intelligence chief, thought to be worth 8 billion. Soccer fanatic and wannabe; fired Libyan soccer chief who described him as 'useless'. Crashed his 130-foot yacht into a wharf in Port Cervo, where he was tossed out of the Billionaires Club. Involved in 1996 shootout at Libyan soccer match in which 8 people were killed and 39 wounded.

Mutassim, 28. Nickname: Hannibal. International drunk & womanizer. Involved in brawl at Rome Hilton where he sprayed police with a fire extinguisher & was escorted to airport.

Sayf al-Islam, 32, bachelor. Businessman also considered for succession, known for keeping Bengal tigers in his Vienna bachelor pad.

Two other sons are out of favor, Muhammed, the eldest, & Mualassim, in exile in Egypt. On the other hand, Aisha's Western affectations have not endeared her to Islamists (Al Qaeda is suspected in 1996 assassination plot against the Colonel.) Now Aisha is heading to Baghdad to make sure mass murderer Hussein gets a fair trail, continuing Libya's trailblazing efforts on behalf of human rights (Libya chaired the UN Human Rights Commission despite the fact that it's a ruthless police state where journalist Abdullah Ali Sanussi-al-Darrat has been jailed without trial since 1973.

Aisha had no comment on the Lockerbie & UTA bombings, the London shooting of PC Yvonne Fletcher, the Berlin disco bombing, or her father's numerous assassinations of his rivals. See also Joe Bob Briggs: Is Libya's Leader Turning Sane?

Posted by Jeff at 09:15 AM | Comments (1)

ABSOLUTELY AISHA

Beautiful Atrocity Aisha Gaddafi

Saddam Hussein, who's been desperately trying to get the toothless UN involved in his trial to ensure a Milosovic-style circus, got a PR boost last week when Libyan glamourpuss Aisha Gaddafi signed on to his legal team. The only daughter of strongman Mohammar Gaddafi, Aisha is variously referred to as Doctor Gaddafi & "the Claudia Schiffer of North Africa" (by the Italian press).

Named for the Prophet Mohammed's 6-year-old child bride, Aisha, 27, is a fashion plate like Raghad Hussein, holds a law degree from Al Fatih University in Tripoli, & worked to attract tourism in Libya, which is not exactly a tourist Mecca. She shops in London & Paris & made a fiery speech in Hyde Park in which she proclaimed the IRA fredeom fighters.

Aisha made her international debut in 1996, when the Colonel took her on a trip to South Africa and she appeared on TV with Nelson Mandela. In 2000, she flew to Baghdad to meet with Hussein, announcing to reporters that her high-profile jaunt was a challenge to the UN sanctions as well as the American & British air patrols that frustrated Hussein's genocidal schemes against the Kurds & Shias (the Gaddafis are Sunnis, like Hussein).

Aisha's fondness for terrorists & mass murderers might be frowned upon in a more conventional family, but a glance at her siblings shows why the Colonel might indulge her.

Al Saadi, 31. Nickname: the hooligan. Compared to Uday Hussein. Married to daughter of Libyan intelligence chief, thought to be worth 8 billion. Soccer fanatic and wannabe; fired Libyan soccer chief who described him as 'useless'. Crashed his 130-foot yacht into a wharf in Port Cervo, where he was tossed out of the Billionaires Club. Involved in 1996 shootout at Libyan soccer match in which 8 people were killed and 39 wounded.

Mutassim, 28. Nickname: Hannibal. International drunk & womanizer. Involved in brawl at Rome Hilton where he sprayed police with a fire extinguisher & was escorted to airport.

Sayf al-Islam, 32, bachelor. Businessman also considered for succession, known for keeping Bengal tigers in his Vienna bachelor pad.

Two other sons are out of favor, Muhammed, the eldest, & Mualassim, in exile in Egypt. On the other hand, Aisha's Western affectations have not endeared her to Islamists (Al Qaeda is suspected in 1996 assassination plot against the Colonel.) Now Aisha is heading to Baghdad to make sure mass murderer Hussein gets a fair trail, continuing Libya's trailblazing efforts on behalf of human rights (Libya chaired the UN Human Rights Commission despite the fact that it's a ruthless police state where journalist Abdullah Ali Sanussi-al-Darrat has been jailed without trial since 1973.

Aisha had no comment on the Lockerbie & UTA bombings, the London shooting of PC Yvonne Fletcher, the Berlin disco bombing, or her father's numerous assassinations of his rivals. See also Joe Bob Briggs: Is Libya's Leader Turning Sane?

Posted by Jeff at 09:15 AM | Comments (1)