March 07, 2006
FASHION INSURGENCY: CINDY SHEEHAN
Recently, when Cindy Sheehan was threatening to run for office, we offered some heartfelt fashion advice on ways to glam up her image (no, they didn't include a paper bag). Yet here she is again, frauleining around at some protest dressed like a peasant. Is it any wonder the Age of Peace is not upon us? Take two:payday loans
Brassiere: If you know you're going to be writhing around in public like a pole dancer, don't throw on some cheapass Playtex shit from JC Penney. Suggestion: Victoria's Secret Lace Push-up in eye-catching aqua
Panties: Try them sometime. Obviously you wanted to avoid VPLs, but seriously, a thong strap would be oh-so-hot right as the Gestapo is getting ready to split your head like an after-Halloween pumpkin.
Shoes: Ever hear of pumps? A lady will put up with a little sciatica as long as she looks fabulous, & you'll have all the lesbians fighting over you when they throw you in the pit!
Outerwear: A peace goddess does not wear Timberline. Prescription: an evil little black chenille jacket with faux fur trim to repel the PETA phreaks. Divine!
Abs: Get some. Seriously, if you're going to run around baring your midriff like Gwen Stefani, get down with some Pilates & switch to Bud Light.
Handbag, anyone? Exactly where do you keep your compact & mad money? Next time try a Juicy Couture Velour Wristlet in Farrah pink & dirty bronze.
Mens black dress socks: No. No. No.
More suggestions here. Ace: "Politics is just show business for ugly people."
Posted by Jeff at March 7, 2006 12:57 AM
Comments
Let's see Drudge try and steal THIS post!
Posted by: SondraK at March 6, 2006 11:57 PM
What up with those pants? I see a lot of lefties wearing those, what are they?
Posted by: scorpius at March 7, 2006 12:08 AM
Regarding the midriff: That's a sweet little sugar-coated muffin top, mmmmm mmmmm, yes it is.
Posted by: Bill from INDC at March 7, 2006 02:16 AM
Those pants are left-overs from the Chinese Cultural Revolution.
Posted by: Patrick at March 7, 2006 06:40 AM
Actually, I'll give her the pants, which are practical for being a street-fightin media ho. They would look completely different with a pair of black slingbacks, a Paris Hilton tube top, & a feather boa
Posted by: beautifulatrocities at March 7, 2006 06:45 AM
How do you know all this shit???!!! You're scaring me again.
Posted by: EssEm at March 7, 2006 07:45 AM
Perhaps we could start a drive to buy her some make-up?
Posted by: Carin at March 7, 2006 09:51 AM
Excellent!
Posted by: Lisa at March 7, 2006 10:15 AM
Those pants are called Peace Mom Jeans.
Posted by: Tom at March 7, 2006 10:43 AM
No, they're called appalling
Posted by: beautifulatrocities at March 7, 2006 10:45 AM
That thing with her abs? It's called a "muffin-top."
Posted by: Stuart Fullerton at March 7, 2006 03:47 PM
Hot!
Posted by: beautifulatrocities at March 7, 2006 03:51 PM
I thought we were going to get a Cindy Sheehan thong-shot, which might well have turned me away from said undergarments for life.
Which would have been a shame. False alarm thankfully.
Posted by: Martin Hague at March 7, 2006 03:58 PM
Carin, What do you mean "Pull a drive by to get her some jewelry?" Like snatch and grab?
nuf sed
Posted by: Frankly Opinionated at March 7, 2006 05:07 PM
okay...one link, one dead server.
prepare for offlineness, buddy!
Posted by: MacStansbury at March 7, 2006 05:48 PM
Two words, freakin' genius!
Posted by: Gordon at March 7, 2006 06:25 PM
That's hilarious, OMG!! I think she's gone beyond muffin top; she's in serious beer belly territory.
Posted by: Patricia at March 7, 2006 06:48 PM
Stu,
It's called a "FOP" (Fat Over PU##@) or a "Gunt". When I saw that pic, I said "check out the boiler on that sideshow freak!"
Posted by: Yiddish Steel at March 9, 2006 08:59 AM