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February 28, 2006
A CANDLE IN THE DARK
Light a candle for Ilan Halimi, a young French-Moroccan Jew lynched, tortured, & murdered by a Muslim gang. See R.I.P. Ilan Halimi (Via Stefania)
Posted by Jeff at 12:19 PM | Comments (3)
ROGUE TRADERS — ‘VOODOO CHILD’
Posted by Jeff at 12:15 PM | Comments (1)
DR. AISHA'S HOME FOR WAYWARD GIRLS
Swank moll
'Doctor' Aisha Gaddafi, fresh from getting canned from
Saddam Hussein's defense team, told Human Rights Watch
she'd get right
on the problem of Libya's social rehabilitation facilities,
which bear an uncanny resemblance to prisons.
Ostensibly set up for 'protection' of woman 'vulnerable to engaging in moral misconduct,' HRW notes most of the women are undergoing rehabilitation against their will, some simply because they were raped & have stained the family honor. Libya's advanced system of social rehabilitation offers these progressive techniques:
Women & girls sleep in locked quarters & are not allowed to leave. Subject to long periods of solitary confinement, occasionally in handcuffs, for reasons like 'talking back.' Most forced to endure virginity examinations. Some are as young as 16, but authorities provide no education except religious instruction. Have no opportunity to contest their confinement & no legal representation
Happily, there's an exit strategy: "There is no way out unless a male relative takes custody of the woman or girl or she consents to marriage, often to a stranger who comes to the facility looking for a wife." The women are attractive as brides because "there are no [pre-marriage] expenses. It is not the same as [marrying] a woman with a family."
A Libyan official denied the report, saying it was based on "certain psychologically vulnerable women & a misunderstanding of Libyan laws."
Irony Alert: Gaddafi Youth Summit. See also Absolutely Aisha!; Tick, Tick, Tick...
Posted by Jeff at 12:11 AM | Comments (9)
THE GLAMOROUS LIFE
Photo © lainey poche
Soldiers from Lainey's photoblog, a gallery of her year & a half with the HHC 256 in Iraq:
"The media often portrays Iraq as being so horrible, & that couldn't be farther from the truth. Even the little things we did everyday made such a big difference. Soldiers are not robots, they are people too. They have feelings & emotions. They, too, are entitled to a little bit of fun every now & then. This website was started to show you how soldiers made the best of their time through the deployment process."
Posted by Jeff at 12:06 AM | Comments (3)
February 27, 2006
BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN: "SHOW ME THE GODDAMN MONEY"
Posted by Jeff at 06:39 AM | Comments (6)
E.T. FOR FRAUD — THE KOJO ANNAN STORY
The media continues to soft-pedal the UN Oil for Fraud
scandal, &
the role of Kojo Annan, who used Daddy Kofi's clout to pocket a fat wad of cash.
Frankly, I never liked him on ET Tonight. His father
totally got him that gig.
What exactly were his qualifications for being a 'correspondent' on the #1 syndicated entertainment newsmagazine in the world©? Mary Hart busted her ass for 23 years to bring you hard-hitting news stories no one else would touch. So her hairdo causes seizures. News flash - she wasn't hired for her looks.
Ok, maybe Paula Abdul & Carlos Ponce were hired because they're pretty — is that why Kojo was hired? I DON'T THINK SO. What's with that grille? Does ET have a dental plan? He looks like a Venus flytrap with veneers.
His Red Carpet Diaries totally downplays his UN connection. We just hear about "his obsessions with his all-blue bedroom & Cheryl Ladd's hair," & that "he wasn't like the other boys." WELL I GUESS NOT. I guess when your father is Secretary General of the UN, you can call yourself a 'fashion expert' & hobnob with Sarah Jessica Parker & the world's your goddamn oyster. Some of us have to work for a living.
See also Fug Carpet: Mary Hart.
Posted by Jeff at 12:05 AM | Comments (6)
February 26, 2006
THE DEAD 60S — ‘RIOT RADIO’
Posted by Jeff at 01:12 PM | Comments (3)
CALIPHATE OF SAN FRANCISCO
If
you thought Saudi Book Fair was an oxymoron, you'd be right.
Saudi Jeans relates his visit to the Riyadh Intl Book Fair,
which is most notable by the books not on display.
Deliciously, a panel on cultural diversity ends abruptly after
screaming extremists drown out a panelist.
The panel also featured the voice of a woman speaker piped in from
another room, like the Wizard of Oz. Closer to home, San Francisco's world-famous self-reverential "independent"
bookstore
City Lights won't stock Oriana Fallaci's books criticizing militant Islam:
"We don't carry books by fascists."
Of course, they have piles of rot by faux-academic
embarrassment Ward Churchill. Q: What does it take for a leftist to by
discredited by City Lights? A: Nothing. So Stalinist liberals who
passionately defended totalitarian communism now defend totalitarian
Islam. Progress!
See also
City Lights' preening website, which breathlessly boasts "the Beats' legacy of
anti-authoritarian politics & insurgent thinking continues to be a
strong influence in the store, most evident in the selection of titles."
HA!
Posted by Jeff at 11:21 AM | Comments (10)
February 25, 2006
NIGHT OF THE LIVING CALAMARI
Related: Urban Legends — the Giant Sand Squid
Posted by Jeff at 06:19 PM | Comments (3)
TICK, TICK, TICK...
Anonymous young Libyan in the wake of the Benghazi uprising & the murder of 11 anti-government protesters by Gaddafi's storm troopers:
Amnesty International has more:
- protests against the cartoons morphed into domestic unrest, including complaints by state employees that they had not been paid for 3 months.
- unrest had spread to Al Bayda, Darnah, & Tobruk
- protesters had broken into a state bank in Tobruk while in Benghazi they toppled placards of Gaddafi before state security fired on unarmed demonstrators, killing 11 & injuring 60
- Italy's consul reported that street clashes in Benghazi were still continuing on Saturday
Next to North Korea, Libya is probably the worst totalitarian hellhole on the planet. Gaddafi is a pharaoh, down to the graven idols, the cult of personality, the dynastic ambitions, & the preposterous monumentalism. Michael Totten recounts his surreal visit to Planet Gaddafi in his killer piece In the Land of the Brother Leader, where he finally coaxes a taxi driver to speak his mind about the Colonel:
"We hate that fucking bastard, we have nothing to do with him. We keep our heads down & our mouths shut. We do our jobs, we go home. If I talk, they will take me out of my house in the night & put me in prison. He steals from us. The oil money goes to his friends.
"Tunisians next door are richer & they don’t even have any oil. We get 3 or 4 hundred dinars each month to live on. Our families are huge, we have five or six children. We don’t make enough to take care of them. I want to live in Lebanon. Beirut is the second Paris. It is civilized! Women & men mix freely in Lebanon."
In other news, Tony Blair commended Gaddafi for his peace efforts. See also Real Story Behind the Libyan Cartoon Massacre
Posted by Jeff at 11:10 AM | Comments (5)
ESSENTIAL GUIDE FOR METROSEXUALS IN PAKISTAN
Fashion tips for guys from Dawn, 'Pakistan's Most Widely Circulated English Newspaper':
I think I had one of those in 7th grade...
Posted by Jeff at 10:40 AM | Comments (6)
REAL CATFIGHTS: STYLE VS FASHION
Posted by Jeff at 07:46 AM | Comments (7)
February 24, 2006
R.I.P. ILAN HALIMI 1983 — 2006
"Hundreds of thousands of people crowded on either side of the street, waiting their turn to enter the synagogue. The synagogue's 3000 seats were full, dozens more mourners stood in the aisles & many thousands remained outside & could not get in. During the chilling ceremony, an 8-year-old read the Psalm I will raise my eyes to the mountains, whence will come my help? near a giant picture of Halimi. This Sunday a huge procession in his memory is scheduled to take place in Paris."
Had enough, Europe? Even the left-wing Liberacion says "Hatred of the Jews has left the category of the unacceptable to become something normal - especially in the eyes of many young people." More at Michelle Malkin
In other news, Muslims all over the world did not riot like animals over the lynching of a Jew by a Muslim gang...
Posted by Jeff at 04:12 PM | Comments (11)
I'M NOT SURE THAT'S SUCH A GOOD IDEA...
Posted by Jeff at 12:34 AM | Comments (4)
WHAT'S GOING ON IN THE U.A.E.?
Opinion polls from Gulf Today show that the UAE is not so different from, well, San Francisco:
Are George W.
Bush & Tony Blair greater threats to the rest of the world than Al
Qaeda? Yes 74% No 22% No Comments 2%
Is Sadr invention of Bush? Yes 77% No 18% No Comments 3%
Will Beslan carnage help Chechnya towards the road of independence? Yes 82% No 15% No Comments 2%
Do you feel there should be censor on freedom of speech? Yes 52% No 46%
Should the state enforce modesty in dress? Yes 50% No 42% No Comments 6%
Is corruption widespread in Dubai? Yes 72% No 24% No Comments 2%
Taliban should hand over bin Laden for trial? Yes 42% No 53% No Comments 3%
Would you support your beautiful daughter's decision to enter a beauty pageant? Yes 41% No 57% No Comments 1%
Al Gore better than George Bush for the Middle East? Yes 53% No 6% No Comments 39%
Like nationals, expats also can have tinted glasses? Yes 95% No 3%
Are you comfortable with AC on full blast in your office in winter? Yes 64% No 33% No Comments 1%
Film-based song & dance shows a waste of time? Yes 60% No 32% No Comments 7%
Are suicide bombings furthering the goal of a Palestinian state? Yes 42% No 51% No Comments 6%
Qatarto serving as base for US attack. Do you think it as right decision? Yes 26% No 68% No Comments 4%
Should we keep our mouth shut to all the nonsense from our boss? Yes 27% No 66% No Comments 6%
There's no fun place other than Dubai in the Gulf? Yes 58% No 35% No Comments 5%
See also UAE's romance with Bin Laden
Posted by Jeff at 12:08 AM | Comments (10)
February 23, 2006
FOR COWBOYS WHO THINK THEIR SHIT DOESN'T STINK
Posted by Jeff at 03:35 PM | Comments (0)
HONEY, I'M GOING OUT WITH THE BOIS — I MEAN THE BOYS...
Posted by Jeff at 08:20 AM | Comments (7)
NURSE DIESEL TO PROCTOLOGY, STAT!
In England, when a nurse loses her license,
she's struck off. I'm not sure what this is, but I hope it involves being bitch-slapped in the dock by one of
those malevolent androids from the Buckingham Guard. Here are
some colorful examples:
Nurse struck off for slapping colleague with dead trout
Nurse who put patient's glass eye in drink struck off (also painted smiley on patient's hernia)
Nurse with 5 aliases struck off (criminal past)
Nurse struck off for hiding patient (psych nurse harbored psycho)
School nurse struck off (too friendly with the boys)
Porn nurse not struck off (entertained himself on children's ward by browsing child porn sites)
Surgeon who told patient 'we all have to die' struck off (get over it)
Doctor struck off for murdering girlfriend (blaming Gulf War didn't help)
Doctor struck off for sex assaults (clue: shaves your pubes for a sore throat)
Bonus: Kiwi lawyer struck off (don't retain if you've been charged with a sex offense)
See also NHS: Every patient treated within 6 months!
Posted by Jeff at 06:33 AM | Comments (7)
February 22, 2006
ARE YOU TELLING ME AL GORE IS A NITWIT?
Posted by Jeff at 06:22 PM | Comments (6)
THE GLAMOROUS LIFE
photo © lainie poche
Brian, a neo-imperialist invader from Lainey's photoblog, a gallery of her year & a half with the HHC 256 in Iraq:
"The media often portrays Iraq as being so horrible, & that couldn't be farther from the truth. Even the little things we did everyday made such a big difference. Soldiers are not robots, they are people too. They have feelings & emotions. They, too, are entitled to a little bit of fun every now & then. This website was started to show you how soldiers made the best of their time through the deployment process."
Posted by Jeff at 12:13 PM | Comments (8)
BRONZE MEDAL FOR TALKING WITH YOUR HEAD SHOVED UP YOUR ASS
"Count me among those who don’t care about & won’t watch them…Try not to laugh when someone says these are the world’s greatest athletes, despite a paucity of blacks that makes the winter games look like a GOP convention." — Mensa member / teleprompter expert Bryant Gumbel
Gee Bryant, last time I checked, snowboard cross was not the rage in Rwanda, & more importantly, American blacks overwhelmingly choose to vote Democratic. Therefore one would expect a GOP convention to be a bit whiter than Death Row.
Is Gumbel against blacks making this choice? Wouldn't a GOP
convention
swimming in chocolate - as they say in Nawleans - make Gumble
cry Tokenism? Can Gumbel do a triple-klutz while pulling his head
out of his ass?
Flashback: "If I’m a young black man in South Central, where poverty is rampant & unemployment is skyrocketing, I see that Washington’s promises of a year ago have gone unfulfilled, I see that perhaps for a second time, the court’s inability to mete out justice in a blind fashion, why shouldn't I vent my anger?" — Bryant Gumbel, 1993, on those restless South Central youth
Hat tip: California Conservative
Posted by Jeff at 07:35 AM | Comments (16)
February 21, 2006
THE REAL STORY BEHIND THE LIBYAN CARTOON MASSACRE
Not anger at the Danes, but at — Gaddafi!
"Benghazi is still out of control. The situation can precipitate any minute. Islamic radicalism has joined forces with domestic opposition."
It won't help you to blame Italy, Colonel. Maybe those worthless kids of yours should start packing for a long Swiss vacation. Meanwhile, in a brave display of dhimmitude, the Italian Foreign Minister promptly visited a mosque, blaming the Libyan riots on now-ex reforms Minister Roberto Calderoli's cartoon T-shirt.
Be careful what you wish for: just prior to the riots, semi-normal son Seif Gaddafi urged Austrian Muslims to take to the streets over the "clash of civilizations." He also showed his keen grasp of democracy by endorsing Bush's call for liberalization in the Mideast, then urged the EU to outlaw mocking the prophet or portraying Islam as a terrorist religion.
The Libyan protests took place in Benghazi, where tensions are already high after a lack of hospital hygiene caused hundreds of children to be infected with AIDS. The Colonel promptly blamed the Mossad, claimed the virus had been bioengineered in a Swiss lab, & sentenced 5 Bulgarian nurses & a Palestinian doctor to death, even though they arrived a year after the children were infected.
In other news, the long-awaitedng of "Gaddafi: the Opera" has been pushed out again. Check back in September.
Posted by Jeff at 08:22 PM | Comments (1)
REAL CATFIGHTS: ANN COULTER VS ARIANNA
Ann Coulter: "The one great thing about the Dick Cheney hunting accident is watching liberals pretend they know something about hunting."
Posted by Jeff at 01:01 PM | Comments (10)
DOES THIS CHE MAKE ME LOOK LIKE A TWIT?
Posted by Jeff at 12:59 PM | Comments (4)
BRUCE BAWER: WHILE EUROPE SLEPT
"These acts of dhimmitude by Norway & Sweden have had their counterparts in the corridors of international power. Franco Frattini, EU Commissioner of Justice, Freedom, & Security, promised to take steps to 'regulate' speech (though he later denied this); Kofi Annan, on Danish TV, said You don’t joke about other people’s religion, & you must respect what is holy for other people. Since when do the EU & UN tell supposedly free people what to respect & what not to respect?
"Many Islamists do not hide the fact that their long-term goal is to turn Europe, step by step, into a Muslim caliphate ruled by sharia law. Alas, it looks at present as if the cartoon controversy may turn out to have been a significant step on the way to that goal. One thing is clear: these have been the darkest days for European freedom in many a decade."
— Bruce Bawer, a liberal gay poet who moved to Europe & got bitchslapped by reality. See also Bruce Bawer: Hating America
Posted by Jeff at 12:58 PM | Comments (2)
February 20, 2006
BETTY BUTTERFIELD ON ELECTION 2004: BUSH OR KERRY?
Posted by Jeff at 07:30 PM | Comments (3)
THE GLAMOROUS LIFE
From gallery of soldiers' photos from Iraq at Under Mars. Click to enlarge. Note foot atop portable heater, a trick I have been using here in the Bay Area the last week as temps have dropped into the 30s, which we consider bone-chilling.
Posted by Jeff at 09:56 AM | Comments (14)
February 19, 2006
BEAUTIFUL ATROCITIES COMPLETE GUIDE TO BETTER SEX
For men whose
wives won't give them oral sex.
For men whose wives want to receive oral, but men who don't want to feel like they're dropping their face into a bowl of cat food (or women / gay men who don't like that annoying post-oral tonsil-butter drip). See also Don't Spit, Swallow
For gay men looking for a sport that includes reaching down your opponent's shorts.*
The communicable lesbian sex disease that's worse than AIDS
Beautiful Atrocities boxer shorts — guaranteed to get you some or your money back. Testimonial from Margi Lowry: "I purchased the super shexay boxers & hoodie from BA & BADDA BING! Nine months later, I got me a baby." You go, girl!
* because the olive oil prevents you from getting any traction, you have to grab the other dude's inseam (like this)
Posted by Jeff at 08:20 PM | Comments (23)
AP: THE CULTURALLY SENSITIVE NEWS NETWORK
What the headline says: 15 Die in Nigeria Cartoon Protest
What the headline means: Islamonutters Murder 15 Christians Over Nothing
See also Reggie the Anti-Barney's Culturally Sensitive Guide to Cartoongate
Posted by Jeff at 08:19 PM | Comments (3)
February 18, 2006
OKAY, NOW THE ISLAMONUTTERS ARE GOING TOO FAR...
Posted by Jeff at 06:12 PM | Comments (5)
MORE REASONS S.F. IS THE LAUGHINGSTOCK OF THE U.S.
Posted by Jeff at 05:12 PM | Comments (10)
WELL IF THAT'S THE WAY YOU FEEL ABOUT IT...
...then we'll just boycott Muslim products. Oh wait — there aren't any.
Posted by Jeff at 01:18 PM | Comments (9)
BEAUTIFUL ATROCITIES DEVOTIONAL SITE OF THE DAY
Posted by Jeff at 01:15 PM | Comments (5)
February 17, 2006
A MESSAGE FROM THE BIG O®
Recently, I was doing my
shtick when 3 terrible words
popped up on the teleprompter: I. WAS. WRONG. I fired 10 people &
kneecapped Dr. Phil before they tranquilized me with a BBQ pork sandwich & sent my
galpal Gayle to tell me it was kinda sorta true.
I should have stuck with Dead Writers Who Don't Talk Back. After that one turd suggested having the Big O® on his book was tacky, like it wasn't a sacred honor to sit beside Wally Lamb & Maya Angelou! W. T. F.
I knew James Frey's A Million Little Pizzas was a Big O® right away, I read it in one 12-hour session on the Stairmaster. Just gimme a juicy account of someone's unimaginably horrific childhood & a Philly cheesesteak: HURTS. SO. GOOD.
But Frey lied to the Big O®! OH. MY. GOD. I am, like, the richest most heinous bitch in the universe, no one so much as crosses their legs in my presence (which is probably why you hear so little about my galpal Gayle).
Verily I say unto you, anyone who hires, helps, assists, befriends,
takes pity on, & / or shags James Frey, I
will fictionalize you, your family, your friends, & all your
relatives. You will never eat Arby's in this town again, because I
am: THE. BIG. O®.
If you had a really appalling childhood involving scaldings, torture, psychic genocide, ooky sexual thingys, or miscellaneous trauma, please contact the Big O® right away!
See also Bruce Willis vs the Big O®; I Hate the Big O®
Posted by Jeff at 10:15 PM | Comments (6)
February 13, 2006
THROW MOHAMMED FROM THE TRAIN
Posted by Jeff at 12:53 PM | Comments (15)
February 10, 2006
AN URGENT MESSAGE FROM BARBRA STREISAND
In which the Diva encourages her devotees to read Fooled Again: How the Right Stole the 2004 Election. Clearly, the correct hormone balance has not yet been reached, but we keep hoping.
UPDATE: Commenter Ryan notes that Fooled Again has only 5-star Amazon reviews. Q: How many Amazon accounts does Barbra Streisand have?
Posted by Jeff at 12:09 PM | Comments (22)
IRRUSTRIOUS RONG-RIFE ERIXIR
The crack scientists at North Korea's Ministry of Public Health continue to bury the West with cutting edge scientific breakthroughs. According to director Kim Myong-Dok, "The successes are attributable to the socialist public health system of the country centered on the popular masses." Latest blockbusters:
Efficacious Pine Needle Foodstuff: In addition to using pine
needles as a delicious condiment, citizens can now enjoy pine needle
tea & pine needle liquor, which boasts 'sexual hormone
preparations'. Recommended for cancer, arteriosclerosis, hypertension,
diabetes, colitis, & cerebral hemorrhage.
Huimang No.2 Health Food: Made from rare medicinal herbs, soy beans, & kelp. Claims makes people look 10 years younger, good for neuroparalysis, arteriosclerosis, hepatitis, & "diseases caused by computer & geomagnetism". Choe Sung Il, 40: "From the evening of drinking I felt no headache. On the tenth day I completely recovered from facial paralysis."
Hyangdam for Hepatitis Developed: "Far better than existing world-famous anti-hepatitis medicines." Made from pig gall.
Royal Blood-Fresh, Health Food: Made from "famous Korean dietary elixir cooked from fermented local beans." Recommended for limb-numbing, speech impediment, vertigo, headache, thrombosis, high- or low-blood pressure, arteriosclerosis. 95% of treated patients resulted in complete cure.
Quit-Smoking Nutritious Pill Developed: Made from rare medicinal herbs. 100% effective. Also good for indigestion. No side effects.
Polyazin for Protection of DNA: "Polyamino acid sap" made from rare medicinal herbs. Protects DNA, also "delights women who want to give birth to healthy & intelligent babies."
Blood-Purifying Finger Ring: Works by sunlight or electric lamp rays passing through specially processed natural jewel. Recommended for hypertension, hypotension, cerebral thrombosis, myocardial infraction, arteriosclerosis, diabetes. Also comes in bracelet.
See also DPR Korea Trade Website
Posted by Jeff at 07:18 AM | Comments (5)
THE LADIES LINGERIE FOOTBALL LEAGUE
Posted by Jeff at 07:05 AM | Comments (5)
February 08, 2006
I HOPE THE POOR GIRL AT LEAST GOT A GOOD TIP
Posted by Jeff at 06:25 PM | Comments (22)
'SPONTANEOUS' COMBUSTION & OTHER MYTHS
Can you think of anyone who might have an interest in keeping this on the front page instead of this?
Posted by Jeff at 01:08 PM | Comments (3)
COLOR-CODED GUIDE TO PEACE
If you're a peace warrior who wants to be part of the solution, one of the most important decisions you can make is which color best suits you. If you're a winter, say, & you join the Red Brigades, you're not just going to spend your life fighting for a lost cause, you'll do so looking wan & washed out. Suggestions:
Code Pink
Moonbat hen party founded by
Medea Benjamin, who said living in Cuba made her feel like she
"died & went to heaven." Still shills for Castro
even though he tossed her out of the country for writing blurb he didn't like. Generously donated $600,000 to terrorists /
paramilitary killers in Fallujah. Recently planned
girls-gone-wild world tour of totalitarian party spots,
including Cuba, North Korea, & Libya.
Women in Black
Calls itself 'worldwide movement'
even though you've never heard of it. "Opposed to injustice, war,
militarism & other forms of violence," but only if it involves Israel.
Women dress in black & hold signs. Website features
idiots guide to vigils:
What's a vigil? A vigil means a nonviolent demonstration in which we hold signs in a public location
Most Women in Black vigils are composed of women [duh].
At vigils, we hold signs The variety is amazing. Israeli Women in Black hold signs that say "End the Occupation". Internationally, many signs read "End the Israeli Occupation".
Ladies in White
Damas de Blanco, consisting of wives of journalists & dissidents
imprisoned by Fidel Castro in his 2003 purge. Gather every Sunday at Havana's Church of Santa Rita - the
patron saint of lost causes - as a silent protest against Castro's
tyranny (like Argentina's
Madres de la Plaza de Mayo). Possible counter-protest to be
held by Code Pink.
Charcoal Shade of
hideously unflattering peekaboo frock worn by
Bush basher / America basher (& now
England basher) Gwyneth Paltrow to 2002 Oscars.
Blue: 1) Increasingly rare US demographic phenomenon.
2) Color of Monica Lewinsky's Gap dress which Bill Clinton
dribbled on while brokering peace agreements with Yassir Arafat
Green: Savvy marketing ploy /
way to save the planet while wiping your ass
Gold Star Families for Peace
Founded by citizen / superstar / Senate hopeful Cindy Sheehan. Opposed
Iraq War, Afghan War, everything else. Set up shanty town / lawn party
in Crawford to
demand Bush have 2nd meeting with Cindy,
who said:
"You get that evil maniac out here, cuz a Gold Star Mother has some questions for him. You tell me that my son died for oil. You tell me my son died to spread the cancer of Pax Americana. You don't tell me my son died for freedom & democracy. Cuz, we're not freer. You're taking away our freedoms. The Iraqi people aren't freer, they're much worse off than before you meddled in their country. You get America out of Iraq, you get Israel out of Palestine."
Purple Finger
of Freedom - Symbol of Iraqi democracy, & sign that Iraqis
braved death threats to vote in Iraq's first free
elections in 35 years.
Scorned by pampered American Leftists, who also
scorn US 2004
election results as fraud.
Red Scare - Popular historical revisionism as seen in Clooney's
Good
Night & Good Luck,
which pretends Communists had not infiltrated US
government at highest levels. Adherents long claimed Alger Hiss
& Rosenbergs as innocent martyrs, changed subject after further
revelations.
Orange Revolution
Peaceful populist revolt in Ukraine that successfully contested rigged
2004 election results. Rallies featured
bodacious Ukrainian pop star Ruslana in skimpy outfits & orange
bandanas.
Rainbow PUSH
Civil rights for fun & profit. Features Jesse Jackson's patented fund-raising
technique of making bogus racism charges against
corporations, who later make substantial cash donations to Rainbow PUSH.
Jackson also pulls strings:
Clinton pardoned Rainbow PUSH official who pled guilty to stealing $1.2
million in government grants.
Lavender:
Queers for Palestine. Aka stupid stupid queens.
Posted by Jeff at 06:53 AM | Comments (13)
February 07, 2006
THAT SHOULD TAKE CARE OF IT
Posted by Jeff at 04:46 PM | Comments (5)
SHARIAH 1, SCIENCE 0
A paternity suit that rocked Egypt
ended with the court ruling against the mother,
despite the fact a DNA test confirmed the man was the father.
That's right: the court (Egyptian jurisprudence is based in Islamic law) ruled that since the woman couldn't
provide documentation that the two
had a secret 'urfi' marriage, paternity could not be established, DNA be
damned.
The case pitted Ahmed al-Fishawy, a pious soap opera actor who hosted an advice show for Muslim youth, against Hind el Hinneway, who was both praised & vilified for breaking Egypt's code of silence & refusing to have an abortion.
Hinneway said that she & Fishawy had an urfi marriage, often made with no witnesses & used 1) by people too poor to afford the cost of marriage, & 2) as a cover for affairs. According to Hinneway, Fishawy tore up the paper contract (men usually keep the contract, & can destroy it when convenient). So women in Egypt are stuck between Islam & a hard place. This is not just a matter of semantics:
Under Egyptian law, a birth certificate is needed to get an identity card, which then allows access to services such as school enrollment & children's health services. However, a birth certificate cannot be issued without the father's name.
Serves the tramp right!
Posted by Jeff at 12:52 AM | Comments (7)
February 06, 2006
SOOOOEY! DANISH IMAMS BUSTED!
Posted by Jeff at 07:42 PM | Comments (4)
LET THEM EAT PAYLESS
She later returned & ran for President but was clobbered. She was convicted on corruption charges in '95 & is still fighting hundreds of lawsuits over squillions of dollars the Marcos clan swindled from the country. Like Colonel Gaddafi (see Gaddafi: the Opera), Imelda is about to be set to music, in a David Byrne / Fatboy Slim musical of the Imelda phenomenon called Here Lies Love. Until then, here's Imelda's latest wisdom:
On corruption charges against her: "Not one of the cases
relate to corruption. It's got mostly to do with property cases where I
managed to use my personal charisma to obtain funds. I still go
to court every month ... Continuous persecution of widows & orphans is a
crime. Even the Bible says there is a specific place in hell
for those who oppress widows."
On Iraq: "I feel sorry for Saddam & pray for him
every day. They found no weapons of mass destruction."
On Corazon Aquino (whose husband was killed by Marcos & who
succeeded Marcos as President): "She took away
everything. Our ancestral property was sequestered, assets frozen
& the expensive paintings were all taken away."
On the War on Terror: "Nobody wins a war. In the law of
the jungle, might is right but at some time the other beasts will
slay the bigger animal."
On having good friends: "I have fond memories of Indira
Gandhi [who suspended the constitution in India] & was there for her funeral ... Gaddafi was the first to offer me
bail when I was in the US, & then the offer came from Saddam."
Imelda's advice for living: "Never argue with destiny,
just be on top of it."
See also the Wit & Wisdom of Imelda Marcos; Imelda the Diva; Imelda the Movie; Effects of shoe heel height on biologic rollover characteristics during walking; high heel cookie cutter; Imelda Marcos shoe museum
Posted by Jeff at 12:45 AM | Comments (9)
February 04, 2006
PEACE MOONBEAM GOES TO GITMO & GETS FATWA'D
Posted by Jeff at 06:38 PM | Comments (1)
THE STROKES — "JUICEBOX"
Aka the video that was too hot for MTV. Because Christina Aguilera with her nogs hanging out is okay, but a little girl-on-girl / boy-on-boy / woman-&-dog is over the line...
Posted by Jeff at 10:58 AM | Comments (6)
February 03, 2006
INTERNATIONAL OFFEND-A-MUSLIM DAY
**scroll for special Doonesbury update!**
Are these the cartoons they mean?
...it's the scent of a thousand years of cultural stagnation
...of getting your ass kicked from Tikrit to Tora Bora
...the menthol tang of your buddy's shaved-for-martyrdom ass
...the gelignite confidence of a killer as comfortable in Baghdad & Bali
as Madrid & Manhattan
...It's 7th Century savagery with 21st Century precision
...It's the horny bouquet of Eternity spent porking 72 virgins whose hymens grow back every time, like those lizards when you cut off their tails, you know the ones I'm talking about.
Jihad le Parfum, by Beautiful Atrocities
And for her: Shariah Feminine Hygiene Spray, because it's not just good hygiene; it's the law
Adnan is wired for style in this casual yet striking ensemble that explodes right off the runway. The smoldering aura of repressed psychosexual confusion is easy to achieve with zip-up low-rise chaps made from hand-distressedpigskinlamb leather. One pocket with Velcro closure, perfect for cell phone or box cutters. Beach friendly, yet also translates to the street with ease, where your gelignite confidence will blow away shoppers, schoolchildren, & Jew dogs. Perfect for high holidays!
Still not offended? See Jihad Blonde; Jihad the Musical; Jihad TV; Jihad Cola
Also America's Most Blaphemous Cartoonists; In Search of a Brave American Newspaper; Theo Van Gogh's Submission
Not Safe for Anywhere: Goatse Mohammed (some interesting stuff, if you can get past, you know...)
Muslims Call for a Day of Anger! Q: How would you tell?
UPDATE:
Wow, cartoonists in Europe are under death threat, yet our most
tired brilliant cartoonist, Garry Doonesbury
Trudeau, remains silent! What gives? I zapped an email to
Slate's Doonesbury central:
"Garry! Your fellow cartoonists in Europe are under death threat. Yet no word from you. We're all waiting for your wisdom on this. Let's hope you're not going to be as silent as the Hollywood foreign policy experts were when a gay Dutch filmmaker was murdered for his art."Send Garry a message! See also Night of the Living Doonesbury
Posted by Jeff at 07:29 AM | Comments (49)
February 01, 2006
ETHEL ROSENBERG VS. ETHEL MERTZ
Modern-day Gorky / Israel-hater Tony Kushner is still flogging the corpse of Ethel Rosenberg. Give it up, girl! The traitorous totalitarian, who makes a camp classic appearance in Kushner's overrated butt-numbing AIDS-a-thon Angels in America, was long hailed as a mother-figure / martyr by the Left.
Sadly, the end of the Cold War brought a flood of declassified intelligence that confirmed Ethel was just another vile Stalinophile, a cold fish so loyal to Lenin's murderous ideology she refused to confess even for the sake of her children. We thought it would be fun to compare & contrast her with another much-loved 1950s icon, Ethel Mertz:
8 X 10 glossy |
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Maiden name |
Ethel Greenglass | Ethel Mae Potter | ||
Main Squeeze |
Julius Rosenberg, electrical engineer (heh) / Soviet agent / non-traditional patriot (Orwellian synonym for 'treason' coined by apologist Ellen Schrecker) |
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Show biz past |
Aspiring actress & singer |
Former vaudeville hoofer |
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Progeny |
Two. When Ethel's mother implored her to testify for the sake of her children, reportedly said "Don't mention the children. Children are born every day in the week." |
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Fan club |
Adored by entire Nation editorial staff |
Adored by millions the world over |
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| Social clubs | Young Communist League, KGB |
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Cuban connection |
Desi Arnaz |
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Recognition |
Memoirs of Nikita Khrushchev, which praise Rosenbergs' "very significant help in accelerating the production of our atomic bomb" & report Stalin "mentioned the Rosenbergs with warmth." |
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Profit-making venture |
Selling nuclear secrets to Uncle Joe, whom she presumably adored for murdering 20 million anti-socialist elements. |
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Famous Oppenheimer |
Robert, father of atomic bomb |
Jess, I Love Lucy producer |
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Unsuccessful venture |
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Candy factory clerk (Video here) |
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Enemy |
Roy Cohn | William Frawley | ||
Posthumous fame |
See also The Trouble with Angels
Posted by Jeff at 12:53 AM | Comments (24)